More news from the “seriously?” department


A video of Magic Minus Zero being sprayed on salt!From the Daily Progress:

Today’s forecasted winter storm will mark the debut of several whiz-bang gizmos that will aid Charlottesville in its quest to promptly plow the city’s streets.

Brian McNeill probably wrote this months ago and was just waiting to give me the opportunity to rip on the city. Whiz-bang gizmos include:

  • Air and surface temperature sensors on bridges
  • LED traffic signals with backup power
  • Magic Minus Zero, a chemical that makes road salt more effective and less corrosive
  • GPS on plow trucks
  • I think sensors are great. Love sensors. Traffic signal sensors especially. I’m just a little confused about what imaginary bridge the sensors are working on. The article mentions the 250 bridge at 29, JPA and Maury, and then Ridge and Cherry. The Ridge bridge is close to West Main. Lies!

    LED, also great. I have no idea how it works, I just know that after two drinks at Ten, the LED bar is The most exciting thing I’ve ever seen. But whatever. I have issues with the lights. First, why don’t all of the lights have back-up batteries? And second, does it really matter when lights go out in a snowstorm and people drive -10mph through intersections?

    Magic Minus Zero. It’s, like, the anti-Poop-Freeze. Remember that? I hate writing that word so much. At least I’m not their corporate spokesperson. Anyway, if I were the Poop-Freeze-Hero, I would hate to meet my evil nemesis, Dr. Magic-Minus-Zero. It even neutralizes rust.

    GPS on plow trucks– what, because they’re going to steal a bunch of Magic Minus Zero, take off to West Virginia, and sell it on the black market? It’s probably so a dispatcher can call and give a location to plow, and the driver can easily navigate there. Boooring.

    Let’s keep talking about possible uses of Magic Minus Zero!

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    34 Responses to “More news from the “seriously?” department”

    1. 17 Jan 2008 at 10:03 ambelmont yo said:

      I keep my whiz bang gizmos in my nightstand drawer *wink*.

      /has said too much.

    2. 17 Jan 2008 at 10:05 ambelmont yo said:

      The GPS is so dispatch can make sure they are not plowing my street.

    3. 17 Jan 2008 at 10:06 amlilith said:

      I would like to see such a gizmo that goes whiz OR bangs.

      /hasoneuppedbyo

    4. 17 Jan 2008 at 10:07 ambelmont yo said:

      Anytime baby, anytime… you just say the word.

      /haschatteduplil

    5. 17 Jan 2008 at 10:08 amBukbukbegak said:

      whiz bang? i thought it was bang, then whiz…so as to prevent the unfortunate contraction of a urinary tract infection.

    6. 17 Jan 2008 at 10:09 amlilith said:

      Bukbukbegak and b yo, I am getting a laugh-cramp from you.

    7. 17 Jan 2008 at 10:12 ambelmont yo said:

      Bukbukbegak: You’re doing it wrong.

      The whiz always comes before the bang. You can pee later to prevent UTI.

      /perhaps I’ll grow a porn mustache

    8. 17 Jan 2008 at 10:13 amBukbukbegak said:

      so it’s whiz-bang-pee? I guess i got a lot of growing up to do.

    9. 17 Jan 2008 at 10:16 ambelmont yo said:

      No, Bukbukbegak, You’ve a lot of banging to do…

      /did somebody call a plumber… bow chika bow woooow…

    10. 17 Jan 2008 at 10:20 amBukbukbegak said:

      That’s for damn sure, this pipes not gonna lay itself. God i love plumbing jokes.

      On an unrelated note, the free belgian beer was excellent. Thanks for the tip. (she said)

    11. 17 Jan 2008 at 10:33 amFloozy said:

      Just got a call… accident on 64 has CLOSED it. It’s getting nasty out there.

    12. 17 Jan 2008 at 10:35 ambelmont yo said:

      Where on 64?

      May as well head home and order a pizza…

      /with extra sausage? bow chicka bow woooowww

    13. 17 Jan 2008 at 10:58 amSilmo Syrup said:

      WOw 64 is closed. How fun! I am still at work. Not doing any work mind you, just goofing off. Hmmm. It’s much easier not to smoke at work than it is at home, so maybe I’ll stay a while. I have non-work work to do anyway.

    14. 17 Jan 2008 at 11:02 amdanpri said:

      The GPS devices “paint” the map of the road they are plowing, allowing dispatch to ID areas that have not been plowed.

      Anyone who learned to drive south of the Mason Dixie line should not be allowed to drive in the snow. They are pathetic. And before you protest, I still dont believe you.

    15. 17 Jan 2008 at 11:10 amSilmo Syrup said:

      Yes danpri. Yes

    16. 17 Jan 2008 at 11:15 amlilith said:

      But will that stop them from running over kittens?

    17. 17 Jan 2008 at 11:15 amFloozy said:

      Byo… the one she called about was at 120. Here’s the latest

      Accident: 10:34 a.m. : I-64 Westbound Westbound at Mile Marker 103 Tractor Trailer Accident: Albemarle County, on I-64 west, at mile marker 103, about 15 miles west of Charlottesville. The right lane is closed. Expect delays.
      #

      Accident: 10:33 a.m.: VA-20 both directions South of Charlottesville. Multiple accidents: Albemarle County, on Route 20 north and south, near Route 627, near Carters Bridge, about 8 miles south of Charlottesville. The road is closed. Expect delays.
      #

      Accident: 9:55 a.m. I-64 Eastbound Eastbound at Mile Marker 114. Tractor Trailer Accident: Albemarle County, on I-64 east, at mile marker 114, near Charlottesville. Both lanes are closed, and traffic is backed up about 3 miles. Expect delays, and seek alternate routes.
      #

      Accident: 9:47 a.m.: I-64 both directions at Mile Marker 100. VDOT is reporting moderate snow conditions on I-64, east and west, in Albemarle County, between mile marker 100, about 4 miles east of Waynesboro, and mile marker 130, about 9 miles east of Charlottesville. Use caution.
      #

      Accident: 9:43 a.m.: US-250 both directions near Charlottesville. Tractor Trailer Accident: Albemarle County, on US 250 east and west, just east of I-64, (mile marker 124 on I-64), near Charlottesville. All lanes are closed. Expect delays.
      #

    18. 17 Jan 2008 at 11:20 ambelmont yo said:

      So I should head home thru town then eh? Basically going from Bel Aire Market/Tiger Fuel to Belmont…

    19. 17 Jan 2008 at 11:21 amFloozy said:

      250 to West Main and down 10th?

    20. 17 Jan 2008 at 11:24 ambelmont yo said:

      I was thinking 250 to West Main and down thru “friendship court”.

    21. 17 Jan 2008 at 11:28 amFloozy said:

      Yeah brave but then driveby’s unlikely today. ..Slide-bys a possibility though. Hopefully fingers will be to numb to pull triggers and such.

    22. 17 Jan 2008 at 11:29 amFloozy said:

      That would be ‘too’… what is wrong with me today… snow day fever already

    23. 17 Jan 2008 at 11:32 amcaroline said:

      you’re drunk silly.

    24. 17 Jan 2008 at 11:33 ambelmont yo said:

      I drive thru there every wed and friday night at 2:30 am for the last 2 years… never even seen a hint of a problem.

      Walked through there at 3 am the first and only time I tried moonshine, and the only problem I had was a fat guy soliciting me for sex from a mercedes…. but thats a story for another time.

    25. 17 Jan 2008 at 11:36 ambelmont yo said:

      And by the way… do ABC stores close for snow. I was just, you know… wondering.

    26. 17 Jan 2008 at 11:40 amThatGrrl said:

      I’m presuming that snow days are huge money days at the ABC. Stock up. Bet they will be closed on Monday for MLK day. Or is the state holiday the dumb Lee-Jackson Day thing? In which case I think that means they might be closed both tomorrow and Monday. I needs me a state job.

    27. 17 Jan 2008 at 11:41 amparlie said:

      i walk home by friendship court every single day and night, usually multiple times. also through the IX distaster, which is “fenced off” and “no trespassing.” i’ve seen nary a problem yet, but that’s because charlottesville isn’t a particularly scary place to live. unless it’s snowing!

      god i am freaking out. i should drive somewhere.

    28. 17 Jan 2008 at 11:49 amFloozy said:

      Perhaps there is some honor code that prohibits attacking anyone that looks like they are coming from/going to the assisted living facility.

    29. 17 Jan 2008 at 12:03 pmparlie said:

      no, there’s no such thing as that. guess again.

    30. 17 Jan 2008 at 12:12 pmcaroline said:

      head out to 64 parlie.

    31. 17 Jan 2008 at 12:12 pmFloozy said:

      You smell bad perhaps?

    32. 17 Jan 2008 at 12:13 pmcaroline said:

      great minds, flooze…

    33. 17 Jan 2008 at 12:56 pmparlie said:

      that is the fetid stench of overwhelming street cred and sherm smoke.

      you both smell bad also.

    34. 17 Jan 2008 at 5:00 pmTheUpstart said:

      Magic Minus Zero is good stuff. They use it in NY and MA. On a roadtrip from NYC to Boston, I learned that CT, unfortunately, does not use it. So, the traffic that was pleasantly moving along at a reasonable pace slammed to a halt for a good hour or so and then started moving again as soon as the road went over the MA border.

      So…who works in a business that stayed open for no customers? Who saw parents of dismissed school kids scrambling to get their kid a ride home because they couldn’t get away from work? I’m sure there are plenty of stories…it seems as if the snow brings out the grouch in some supervisors.

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