How to Steal $7 Billion Dollars Without Anyone Knowing

When I read this I almost crapped myself. Well, I did… just a little Some dude stole over $7 billion dollars without anyone knowing. You thought the mortgage problem was bad. Can ze fwreanch mownitoar zer empowees? I am not making this up….

The French bank Sociate Genarale stunned financial markets today by revealing that it had been the victim of one of the largest frauds by a rogue trader — losing four times as much as Nick Leeson, the man who sank Barings.

The second-biggest French bank said that it had lost €4.9 billion (£3.7 billion) as a result of the rogue trades by a Paris-based trader who concealed his positions through “a scheme of elaborate fictitious transactions.”

[via Times Online]

Have you every stolen from work?

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32 Responses to “How to Steal $7 Billion Dollars Without Anyone Knowing”

  1. 24 Jan 2008 at 9:17 amtrashworth said:

    Meh. That’s nothing. I once stole $11 bn from the federal government without anyone knowing. Hehe… funny story that…

    Oh, crap. I gotta go look at some international flights.

  2. 24 Jan 2008 at 9:30 amcolfer said:

    Bets not withdrawals,
    Like Leeson, just trying to
    Hide his derriere.

  3. 24 Jan 2008 at 2:44 pmStanley said:

    Anecdote: in high school, I worked at a mom ‘n’ pop pizza place in Richmond. They had 20-oz. pop in a cooler, and employees had to pay for ‘em, taping the receipt to the bottle. Of course, lots of unscrupulous employees (never yours truly, of course) would just keep re-using the same receipt over and over, confident that no manager was going to actually check the date. Eventually, the management got so miffed about stolen drinks that they installed this “camera” in the ceiling to monitor the drink cooler. It was so obviously a fake, plus who’s going to watch twelve hours of reel of a Coke cooler? And how would you even know that Employee X removing a drink from the cooler isn’t getting it out for a legitimate order?

    Ah, competence.

  4. 24 Jan 2008 at 4:52 pmcolfer said:

    i was right, and with
    remaining syllables woo
    la francaise de galles

  5. 24 Jan 2008 at 8:48 pmditto said:

    7 billions dollars is just too big for cvillains to wrap their heads around.. It reminds me of the character, Dr. Evil, interested in world domination…and it’s some kind of joke.. “100 Million Dollars”….a figure too big to be serious about.
    well, 7 billion is few more!

  6. 24 Jan 2008 at 8:49 pmditto said:

    Isn’t it?

  7. 24 Jan 2008 at 9:10 pmshst said:

    “ISN’T IT”?

  8. 24 Jan 2008 at 9:50 pmStanley said:

    OT: Holy crap, it was just snowing like the dickens up by the airport, but here in Belmont: nothing. And weather.com says nothing doing. What gives?

  9. 24 Jan 2008 at 11:53 pmlilith said:

    You still holding to that weather report, Stanley?

  10. 25 Jan 2008 at 12:14 ammc said:

    stanley, it was totally snowing in belmont… beautiful big white flakes and a light dusting on the ground. Maybe 9:30 or so? You must have missed it!

  11. 25 Jan 2008 at 12:19 amlilith said:

    mc, I am trying desperately to find my old Wes Anderson Royal Tenenbaums snow flurry music, to no avail. Can you either provide it or throw a late night party? :)

    Lotsa fun, everyone, thanks!

  12. 25 Jan 2008 at 12:26 amStanley said:

    This song, lilith?

  13. 25 Jan 2008 at 12:29 ammc said:

    that’s the one I’m thinking of Stanley, from Rushmore. ahhhh, mark mothersaugh, you are a genius!

  14. 25 Jan 2008 at 12:30 ammc said:

    mothersbaugh!

  15. 25 Jan 2008 at 12:31 amStanley said:

    Woo! Crank it up, mc! We’re all coming over.

  16. 25 Jan 2008 at 12:37 amparlie said:

    DOCTOR evil, actually. i didn’t spend six years in evil medical school to be called mister,

    thank you very much.

  17. 25 Jan 2008 at 12:41 ammc said:

    parlie, you is drunk to be quoting some mike myers here.

  18. 25 Jan 2008 at 12:44 amlilith said:

    I’m totally jealous, who’s having the party?! And it’s in Rushmore and Tenenbaums, if I am not mistaken. Or Bottlerocket plus one of the above. It’s a 2/3. We’re not counting Life Aquatic or the new one I shall not speak of.

  19. 25 Jan 2008 at 12:50 amStanley said:

    who’s having the party?!

    Having missed the meet-up due to work, dijonbray, I, et. al. are drinking low-budg wine and gossiping about all of you. That counts, right?

    Party central over here.

  20. 25 Jan 2008 at 12:57 ammc said:

    seriously, let’s pretend life aquatic never happened.. but oh, Adrian brody is so cute in Darjeeling. I have the rushmore soundtrack, it is absolutely in that one, and I don’t think it repeats in the others… call me wrong!

    I’m imagining I’m at stanley’s house. I’m having a party in my mind.

  21. 25 Jan 2008 at 1:03 amshenanigans said:

    does anyone ever know, wtf, colfer is talking about? I’m just wondering….

  22. 25 Jan 2008 at 1:05 amStanley said:

    Aside from being generally topical and talking in haiku? Nope.

  23. 25 Jan 2008 at 1:17 amparlie said:

    i’m at the party in mc’s mind.

  24. 25 Jan 2008 at 1:17 amparlie said:

    it is fantastic.

  25. 25 Jan 2008 at 1:26 ammc said:

    *BLUSH*

    (but actually, yeah, it is…..)

  26. 25 Jan 2008 at 1:28 amTim said:

    I am in a fight with all of you who don’t liek Life Aquatic. Not only is it fantastic, but it is the first and only movie that really fully embraces and immerses you in that alternate reality that Wes has in his head. Everything else was just an appetizer.

    Also, what are the oddds that we would get to see two filmakers with the last name “Anderson” making movies at the top ofth ier game simultaneously?

    So psyched for There Will Be Blood. Where’s my glock?

  27. 25 Jan 2008 at 1:29 amTim said:

    PS: Parlie’s mom is fantastic.

    That’s right, I just went there. OHHHHHH!

  28. 25 Jan 2008 at 1:33 amparlie said:

    afro/chinstrap, and so on… ahh, mom jokes!

  29. 25 Jan 2008 at 1:37 ammc said:

    no no no . royal tb’s is immersive, with heart, a complete NYC with wes’s imposed aesthetic, costumes, sets, everything, with heart and soul. Aquatic is all aesthetic with far less heart. love bill murray regardless.

    seriously, how am I so chicken as to avoid talking to parlie? my internet and live personalities do not match up.

    also, with this raging party of the imagination, I am having trouble sleeping… but I will attempt it, starting now.

  30. 25 Jan 2008 at 1:44 amparlie said:

    first off; mc, thanks for giving my pants a smile. you’re some sweet internet sugar.

    i forgot what else i was going to talk about.

  31. 25 Jan 2008 at 4:30 amcolfer said:

    70b wagered,
    he stole nothing, spun around,
    bank lost 7b.

    C’est a dire parfois,
    les jeux sont fait, emprunte-on,
    le banque a pari.

    Dans l’hiver profound
    enfin le sol tout embrace
    la premiere neige.

    Mas, then winter squalls
    And the ground it now embraces
    snow without melting.

    http://online.wsj.com/article/SB120115814649013033.html?mod=hpp_us_whats_news

  32. 25 Jan 2008 at 9:07 amcaroline said:

    drunkies.
    @tim #26, yes, yes, yes!

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