The Case of the Stoned Trespassers

Posted by Thor on March 30th, 2008 45 Comments

stoned pizza charlottesville steal

Ok, so apparently, at Woodlands Ave around 11:30 PM on Friday night, two men broke into an apartment.

Instead of stealing a TV or a play station or something like that, they decided to order pizza.

The pizza delivery guy came and they held a gun to him, forced him to come inside and robbed him.

They then stole his car. The car (with a giant pizza sign, probably) is still missing. License plate is KGN-2401.

No word on what type of pizza, if they ate it or the choice of toppings.  What do you think they ordered?

[via WCAV, pic]

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45 Responses to “The Case of the Stoned Trespassers”

  1. 30 Mar 2008 at 12:08 pm1parlie said:

    when you’re committing multiple felonies, you can work up quite an appetite! that’s why towelie always says…

  2. 30 Mar 2008 at 12:22 pm2belmont yo said:

    I think that pizza delivery should become a branch of homeland security.

    Papa John Ashcroft? Domino-fly list? Anyone?

  3. 30 Mar 2008 at 12:49 pm3Street said:

    Looks like someone wrote a book about it already.

  4. 30 Mar 2008 at 1:13 pm4orchid said:

    when i was a kid people broke into our vacation home in palatka, florida. they were apprehended by the cops. among the stolen items (nothing of any value) was toilet paper.

  5. 30 Mar 2008 at 1:45 pm5belmont yo said:

    When I was a kid, dark spirits broke into my mind, made a frozen ego pizza, left a bunch of dirty neurosis in the sink, wrote profanity on the inside of my skull, and made off with my sense of self discipline.

  6. 30 Mar 2008 at 1:55 pm6Street said:

    What do you think they ordered?

    A pizza covered with (criminal) capers, (magic) mushrooms, and red pepper (spray).

  7. 30 Mar 2008 at 2:34 pm7Uva LaGrape said:

    Street that’s too good for a mere cVillain to have thought up…where did you steal that from?

  8. 30 Mar 2008 at 2:40 pm8Stanley said:

    It’s odd the story doesn’t mention the tenant of the apartment. Like, what, he or she came home and found a pizza dude, bound and gagged, surrounded by some empty beer cans and a cashed bowl? Bizarre indeed.

  9. 30 Mar 2008 at 4:53 pm9five said:

    Forgetting all the great home cooked meals, my taste buds have organized a protest and are marching in cadence saying, “Pizza, pizza, pizza!” I have to order a three topping pizza to resolve this issue. I believe this is the same problem the thugs faced.

  10. 30 Mar 2008 at 5:12 pm10Street said:

    @7 Sorry, that lunacy was borne of my mind. :p

  11. 31 Mar 2008 at 10:45 am11shenanigans said:

    I love how badly they misspelled bizarre on the WCAV site. Way to go Newsplex. I got some news for you, there are people you can pay called editors that make sure that don’t happen.

  12. 31 Mar 2008 at 11:22 am12shenanigans said:

    Just noticed that 434 misspelled Bazaar on his post. What is going on today???!!!

  13. 31 Mar 2008 at 5:20 pm13five said:

    I saw this post again, and it had me rushing back to the fridge to devour the remaining slices of pizza.

  14. 31 Mar 2008 at 5:35 pm14Street said:

    Oh, the influence the cVillain has on impressionable minds… Next it will have you drinking and dancing down the road. ;)

  15. 31 Mar 2008 at 6:32 pm15five said:

    @14. Done that… Let’s work on streaking down Main Street!

  16. 31 Mar 2008 at 6:36 pm16Street said:

    I still want to do the Time Warp Across Cville. We’d need lots of villains, though.

  17. 31 Mar 2008 at 6:58 pm17five said:

    I’m in! Not assuming other cvillains’s are as easy as I, but willing to bet they’d give it a go.

  18. 31 Mar 2008 at 7:05 pm18Odie said:

    five just said she was easy

  19. 31 Mar 2008 at 7:11 pm19five said:

    What if I have balls? BIG ONES???

  20. 31 Mar 2008 at 7:11 pm20Max Bacon said:

    blowin’ your mind

  21. 31 Mar 2008 at 7:18 pm21Odie said:

    five said HE was easy?

  22. 31 Mar 2008 at 7:19 pm22five said:

    Nice Odie. yes I am!

  23. 31 Mar 2008 at 7:31 pm23Stanley said:

    Just noticed that 434 misspelled Bazaar on his post. What is going on today???!!!

    I’m pretty sure that was on purpose. It’s in quotation marks, it’s not capitalized, and the post is about how the Tea House is a funky, fun place.

  24. 31 Mar 2008 at 7:44 pm24lolo said:

    funky fresh indeed

  25. 31 Mar 2008 at 8:09 pm25belmont yo said:

    Stoned Trespassers II: Electric Bugaloo

    Funky fresh! Best Check yo’ sef befo you wreck yo’ sef!

    /thats wack, yo!

  26. 31 Mar 2008 at 11:21 pm26five said:

    wiggidy wiggidy wack yo! Let me break it down, “1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9… it’s the Ten Crack Commandments… I’ve been in this game for years… Number 4, I know you’ve heard this before, **never get high on your own supply**…”

    Now that’s B.I.G. for you.

    /Just keeping it fresh. :)

  27. 01 Apr 2008 at 12:52 am27shenanigans said:

    @23: No honey-bunny, I didn’t mean in the title which is too obvi, I mean when he gets to the end of the post. Whatevs, I’m just linguistic-prescriptive I guess. And by linguistic-prescriptive I mean needing some pot.

  28. 01 Apr 2008 at 12:58 am28Stanley said:

    Oh, I’m dumb. And, apparently, not high enough.

  29. 01 Apr 2008 at 1:08 am29five said:

    *High* Stanley. I see you’re an insomniac too.

  30. 01 Apr 2008 at 1:13 am30scoriole said:

    me too, i’m insomniacal…

  31. 01 Apr 2008 at 1:14 am31Stanley said:

    Insomniac, sure. High? I don’t resemble that remark.

  32. 01 Apr 2008 at 1:19 am32five said:

    Not to worry Sir Stanley. Most of us don’t… so don’t take it to heart.

    Virginia is for… cVillains.

  33. 01 Apr 2008 at 1:24 am33scoriole said:

    i doubt we’d be insomniacs if we were *high*, as i recall…
    i believe sleep came easy then.
    /very easy…

  34. 01 Apr 2008 at 1:26 am34Stanley said:

    No offense taken. Lots of people smoke the ganj with no adverse consequences. Go them!

  35. 01 Apr 2008 at 1:27 am35buster said:

    i don’t think 1:30am qualifies as insomnia time… 3:30, on the other hand, perhaps…

    /just got off work and the more i look at that pizza, the more i want it. not good.

  36. 01 Apr 2008 at 1:30 am36five said:

    I’m sure the picture of the pizza would make their cravings run wild.

  37. 01 Apr 2008 at 1:42 am37scoriole said:

    back away from the pizza.
    3:30?! how about 5:30…

  38. 01 Apr 2008 at 1:44 am38Stanley said:

    PIzza at scoriole’s at 5:30. Everyone’s going. Party!

  39. 01 Apr 2008 at 1:44 am39five said:

    That’s time to get up scoriole. You’re a champ though, sleeping for a couple hours then tackling a full day.

  40. 01 Apr 2008 at 1:45 am40scoriole said:

    no, that’s when sleep comes, like a drug(not just on sundays…)

  41. 01 Apr 2008 at 1:46 am41scoriole said:

    and it’s ice-cream cake, not pizza, duh.

  42. 01 Apr 2008 at 1:51 am42five said:

    I owe you a cookie Scoriole.

  43. 01 Apr 2008 at 1:52 am43scoriole said:

    mmm. cookies. that’s what “c” is for.

  44. 01 Apr 2008 at 1:56 am44five said:

    “c”??? Call me shady.

  45. 01 Apr 2008 at 1:58 am45scoriole said:

    i’ll be the one wearing sunglasses…

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