I had a particularly alcohol filled Saturday night. And to top it off, I had the whole world on my thermostat setting. Booya. I pretty much ended up everywhere last night as a combination of booze and weather love. I was thinking ah yes a great night to go out. Spring fever was in full effect, but alas…
Apparently, no one told me the entire night would be filled with bachelorette parties!
Bachelorettes and their entourage are an interesting bunch. I have yet to fully understand this rather lame social phenomenon. I mean guys fully appreciate their last night of singlehood and often embark on a quest to get fully wasted, justifying the gropage of strippers and the full embarrassing of the groom. Sorry ladies, it happens 9 out 10 times whether you like it or not.
Bachelorettes (at least the ones from last night) were the total opposite. I think I saw 5 separate bachelorette parties and 4 of those were probably some of the most boring parties I’ve ever seen. Honestly, it’s your last night to be out: live it up.
First of all, bachelorette parties make an extra special effort to stick out from the norm which is fine. But, can we clearly label the bachelorette? It’s so hard to find the one between all the glow sticks, silly hats and mini tiaras.
My favorite encounter with a b-party was with a small 4 to 5 lady party sitting at the end of the bar at Blue Light. Not surprising they were sipping on martinis and out of the action. Someone had fortuitously given the bride to be a set of dirty dice. Dirty dice are those party gags that you roll and contain an action and a target. After nearly 3 separate rolls, forgoing kissing, taking a shot and flashing various males in the bar, she finally agreed to the “hug” action. This party could have been in the c bracket.
My night was haunted by b-parties. I couldn’t escape them. The girls brought the party, but somehow forgot what a party was. Can we give the ladies some hints on how to drink? Can bars start buying them tequila shots to get their party off to the right start. The b-party at X-Lounge was certainly the most entertaining if anyone got to participate. I lost count of how many shots they bought.
Now, time for me to plan my bachelor party, watch out ladies, we have fun.
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Tagged as: bachelor, bachelorette, Party, season, Wedding
There was a snoozefest of a bachelorette party at Zocalo for a good hour and a half.
Despite the outrageous - wait for it - FEATHER BOA and “Bachelorette” tiara (I know, can you believe how ‘to the limit’ these girls took it), these 5 bags of flour sat in the corner of the tables by the bar and pretty much just looked around. The Bride-to-be, get this, had a pink martini glass with a likeness of the male genitals (shaft only( as the stem of it. I don’t know where they came up with the “outside the box”, zany concepts, but I was shocked to see the bachelorette herself wasn’t living it up.
quote:
Do I enjoy a decent bath because I know that John Smith cannot afford one - or because I delight in being clean? Do I admire Beethoven’s Fifth Symphony because it is incomprehensible to Congressmen and Methodists - or because I genuinely love music? Do I prefer terrapin à la Maryland to fried liver because plowhands must put up with the liver - or because the terrapin is intrinsically a more charming dose? Do I prefer kissing a pretty girl to kissing a charwoman because even a janitor may kiss a charwoman - or because the pretty girl looks better, smells better and kisses better? (Mencken, “Professor Veblen,” from Prejudices, First Series, 1919).
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Theory_of_the_Leisure_Class#Criticism
Sounds exceptionally lame Thor - much like my evening.
Tequila shots are always a good idea.
Wow, I’m gonna quit my job and become a bachelorette party planner. Those chicks need some help. The one with the boa and tiara came in to OXO and they didn’t even order shots.
women that buy feather boas and tiaras before a last night on the town probably dont go out drinking that much in the first place and end up looking like lame cliches with their “naughy” games and novelty genitalia paraphernalia. sucks for them, point made… but, cmon, describing exactly where they were, what they were wearing and where they sat to the extent that they are easily identified is unneccessary, snarky and completely condescending. no, i wasnt a member of any of these bachelorette parties, and find them just as boring and annoying as everybody else. but, seriously, this is insanely immature and sounds like something youd hear a pledge master say during rush week: “Can we give the ladies some hints on how to drink?”
Rule #1: You can not have a great bachelor/ette part in the same town you live. No exceptions.
Vegas is best for guys, Montreal, Atlantic City, and NYC all fit the bill.
Florida has much to offer as well.
Woman need distance as well a men to let the freak flag fly!
weaklings, piddling on my peeps partees, running off to your pretend cities, get your own discontent and wring it
Speaking of this weekend, did anyone go to the opening of Ventana?
I walked by. Two fab fair elles at the bar, one in a rose pink Marilyn dress. I was dreamin it was Lilith.
What / where is Ventana?
Men can go to Vegas and fuck and stripper and come back and marry the fiance no problem. If women find a good fuck in Dirty Vegas, they don’t come back. They think they’re in love.
9: It’s the new joint in the old Kiki spot, yo.
There were literally 5 or 6 groups out there, bridge, so I don’t think we did any harm. I just wished they had more fun!
[…] Oh, and don’t forget our review of South Street on Tuesday nights as well as our run in with boring bachelorette parties. Don’t forget your […]
I haven’t been to too many bachelorette parties, but I do think I’ve discovered the fatal flaw - they always start too early. For example, for both mine and a friend of mine’s, we headed up to Philly. From home base (a hotel room), around 6 PM, the obligatory genitalia paraphenalia was broken out, but only because we were headed out to dinner and then straight to bars. Nothing spells awkward quite like having a bunch of friends who may or may not have met each other before (think high school meets college meets real life) first meet each other over the likes of penis pasta and a mere glass of champagne.
Now, had we simply gone to dinner, hit a few bars and then turned everything from “night out” to “last night of singledom,” the sudden introduction of a tierra would sound like a brilliant idea instead of an obligation.
That being said, I have very little recollection of mine and am still convinced that my bridesmaids totally made up the fifth bar where I apparently danced (i don’t dance) and rated the relative merits of various male patrons’ backsides. Man, did that hurt the next morning.
Hopefully you ladies who were out bachelorette partying this weekend have better sense than to pay any attention to these mean-spirited comments, but just in case y’all are lurking, remember: they’re just jealous.
My sister’s bachelorette party was in Vegas. It would have been a lot more fun if she wasn’t already in Bridezilla mode. And if male strippers weren’t so excruciatingly cheesy. And if one of her friends wasn’t my least favorite person in the entire world.
/Got to stop posting on marriage-related topics. Harboring bitterness.
@17 sounds like not enough alcohol was ingested at that party-
Harboring bitterness
Give in to your anger. Feel the power of the dark side.
@18 - False. There’s just not enough alcohol in the world to make up for certain levels of misery and frustration.
@20 I’m very sorry to hear that. Vegas with sucky people is a very sad place to be. Next consider a jailbreak- make up some wild hook up story and just go have fun.
@19 - Haha, thanks for the advice b’yo.
@21 - I’m going back in May with a good friend of mine. Hoping to replace the bad Vegas experience with a good one.
Before you go check outnapkinnights.com. You can get on the VIP list for free to a lot of bars. Go to events and see which places have a guest list. Plus you can check out the crowds with all the photos.
@23 - Cool! Thanks for the tip.
@16
I know of a few lurkers that were in attendance of local bachelorette parties this weekend. So far I don’t think they are too concerned about the pessimistic comments. It isn’t making them any fonder of the site though.
I do agree that they may have started the night a bit too early, which led to some orphans and some only half-awake party-members by closing time. At least one of those parties was just a little bit more uptight than it should’ve been because parents were in attendance. That party was only stage 1 for that group, however. They’re hosting another much less reformed party this coming weekend.
@25: Re: Unhappy lurkers: If you go out in public wearing a feather boa, tiara, and drinking from a Penis glass, you are inviting attention and/or ridicule.
@ 26 Well, there go MY weekend plans.
@17 the one time i got a lap dance from a male stripper i was all grossed out because he was stubbley all over his body & it reminded me of my mom’s legs when i was a kid.
Your mom was a guy?
when i was a kid; she isn’t anymore.
/don’t judge.
trillian: bitterness? left at the altar?
@31 - Hahaha, no, my sister’s wedding was just an epic study in bitchiness, craziness and wasted money. I still fume about it sometimes.
colfer: your theory of the leisure class link was interesting. I’ve often wondered whether blue-eyed blonde women were desired in western culture cuz of their skill as lovers or because they increased/indicated the social status of the owner of the blonde.
Challenge!!! Please help me plan and party Friday the 23rd–throwing a bachlorette party for a non-drinking quiet future sis-in-law….going to party for her
Any ideas? (I am not in or from the area) Thanks all!
@34: Wait until the 25th and come to the space party
@ 34 Ketamine and tranny hookers. Doesn’t matter where you are, you can’t lose with this combo. Have fun!
Spas, Downtown Mall Dinners, etc.
quiet non drinking future sis-in-law? Call her friends and ask what she likes to do. It could be bowling, listening to music or anything you would do normally.
Would you like to have a special bonding time with the kind of dirt on her you can use forever? Then the answers is ROADTRIP!
My suggestion Chippendales North America Tour
Swiftwater, Pennsylvania on May 23, 2008 at Pocono Brewing Co at 10:00 pm.
The trip takes 5 hours and when you are done you could head to NYC for the weekend.
You won’t know a soul there and that is a huge plus.
Or you could pay Shen to plan and it would probably rock - yet still be local.
Thanks so much!!!! Love the Chippendales idea!
NON-DRINKING? Omfg I can’t deal with that.
Love the Chippendales idea
Not to towel up your lubrication, but they are all gay.