Straight Punch to the CLAW!!!

Posted by Silmo Syrup on June 10th, 2008 9 Comments

 CLAW

CLAW V – Sparkles’ Revenge!

Virginia’s premier sports and entertainment league – Charlottesville Lady Arm Wresters or CLAW is back and ready for hot summer action. CLAW 5 brings the world’s first ever al fresco wratlin’ contest. That’s right we’ll be performing this Tuesday out of doors behind the Blue Moon Diner in a fancy army tent

We’ll be raising big bucks for Shelter for Help in Emergency [SHE]. Admission is always free but we have special ring side seats available for $5/ea. First-come first-served. So get there early! This month’s special celebrity judges: the members of Straight Punch to the Crotch. The tournament starts 8 pm sharp and lasts until we have just one woman standing (or someone breaks their arm, whichever comes first) After the tournament our celebrity judges will play us a little concert, so come early and stay late with CLAW and Straight Punch to the Crotch

WrasslersThe PunctuatorUlysses S. NopantsPurple HazeUnholy Betty RollerTommyknockerSparklesThe PitbullMohammed Sugar Ray Cato Bruce Lee Celebrity Judges: Straight Punch to the Crotch with Permanent Lifetime Judge Jim Waive

Mistress of Ceremonies: Rosie the Wrist-Twister

Nurse: Nurse Cheryl

Ref: The Ref

Umpire: The Empire

Stage Manager Extraordinaire: MoJo “the Underdog” Boudreaux

Money Honey: Trixie “The Vault” Mancini

Merch Table: Luchadora Herself

Audience: TBD

Photography Exhibit: Come see Billy Hunt’s exhibit: “CLAW!!!!!!” featuring portraits of CLAW wrastlers at Café Cubano.

Thor’s note.. I screwed the pooch on this one. I am sorry everyone. :(

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9 Responses to “Straight Punch to the CLAW!!!”

  1. 10 Jun 2008 at 11:04 pm1mc said:

    serious screwing of the pooch, Thor, but plenty of villains still made it out. It was hot and sticky and there was dancing and SPTTC rocked it, people. theme song stuck in my head! beatdown after motherfucking beatdown. lightning threatened from every angle and yet a mysterious positivity bubble kept us safe all night.

    one request: can Blue Moon PLEASE keep the kitchen open a little late on claw nights? you’ll make some bucks, I promise.

  2. 11 Jun 2008 at 10:19 am2echo said:

    South Street was fun last night. Does anyone have some good CLAW stories?

  3. 11 Jun 2008 at 10:28 am3434, baby! said:

    I’m bummed I missed it. SPTTC is awesome!
    I’ll definitely make it to their CD release party is on June 21st at Zinc, should be a great time.

  4. 11 Jun 2008 at 10:33 am4mc said:

    a highlight: a prolific cvillain commenter, in a dream state, lamenting bribery for a Tinker Hell victory over the Pitbull due to its similarity to the George W. Bush system of money = power. for the record, tinker hell deserved the win, man. Also, the ref pulled handcuffs out of crotch and put them directly onto the lady’s wrists. whoa.

    Claw is a bit repetitive, but I’ll keep going for cheap PBRs and the chance to hang out with folks. oh, and the charity.

  5. 11 Jun 2008 at 10:34 am5mc said:

    434: we’ll dance it up!

  6. 11 Jun 2008 at 10:57 am6shenanigans said:

    Was this posted after CLAW happened? Lame.

  7. 11 Jun 2008 at 11:18 am7434, baby! said:

    mc: you know it!

  8. 11 Jun 2008 at 1:57 pm8Thor said:

    I screwed it up. I was on a 6 day bender.

  9. 11 Jun 2008 at 3:21 pm9caroline said:

    it was good to see lotsa villains there last nite, ya’ll are hott.

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