How ’bout it “Cvillians?” What are your daily doses of dramatic woo-ing? The shopping spree at the Fashion Square Mall that turns into mental undressing of the guy or girl next to you that by fate, turns into the one you snuggle up with that night, or the incredible specimen of the opposite sex that your friends introduce you to at Blue Light? Charlottesville has been rated numerous years as one of the best places to live in the United States. People come here from all over to live, find a job and settle down. A place of excitement, beautiful rolling country, and wealth. A balance of innocence like Fridays After 5 and the slight corruption of Club 216 that make C’ville sit still on its pendulum and give the people the chance to sway. What could be a better place to find love, sex, a significant other and the romance of your life than a place that is so balanced like this small city, big town? It may lack the splendor of the sky-scraping buildings of New York City and it doesn’t have the rushing ocean breeze of a marine paradise but what it lacks in the obvious it has in its intricacies and distinct personality that one can only understand and be part of after residing here for a good amount of time. There are unique stories all around C’ville of romance that take place in this inimitable town that we, as locals, experience. So “Cvillians”, let’s hear those passionate stories that stimulate the hearts of anyone who cares enough to be touched by it!
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Tagged as: carrie bradshaw, love, romance, sex
i want to tie this post to a wrought iron bed frame and teach it a lesson.
i want to tie this post to a wrought iron bed frame and feed it tartare. think 2 girls 1 cup, but with tartare.
ok, for serious now….while not the same type of location as Central Park, I have heard many a romance starting from the local kickball teams of Charlottesville Sports and Social Club.
And now many new young dating encounters are springing from the former Charlottesville Drinking Club, now originally titled “The Club”
@3 yes, but those are known as “daylight blackout romances.”
and they DON’T COUNT.
I’m not touching this post with a 40 foot long pole.
I bet you will once 3:30 rolls around.
what is sex?
A synonym for gender.
three couples in my little circle have broken up in the last few weeks, signaling the end of the summer relationship cycle. the market is flooded with singles. moving forward into the next quarter, blah blah blah, just sign up for the villain blind date and *cross your fingers* bang your e-crush.
I would like to welcome Guardian to the blog. The edible panties and Spanish-fly laced punch are on the table over there.
we expect to post strong results finishing off the third quarter, coming hot on the heels (ew) of Q2. quite frankly, Q2 surprised us and sprang prematurely out the gate, and continued its rocket-like trajectory across the face of several potentially dry months (august being a notorious wateland of sexlessness.)
with a bountiful Q3, we anticipate a tolerable winter and a potentially early start to spring season, traditionally marked with a spike in unplanned pregnancies at foxfield.
A synonym for gender
Actually, no, it’s not. Gender is a culturally created category while sex is hormonally determined. But in this case, sex means, roughly, “bumpin’ uglies”.
I think I was in love once… She was Brazilian, or Chinese, or something weird. I met her in the bathroom of K-Mart and we made out for hours. Then we parted ways, never to see each other again.
@3 totally. honestly, what boggles me is how this guy keeps all the women off him.
http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2363/2466021621_a93de20a26.jpg?v=0
Do you know what her gender was?
@10
three couples dissolved? tragic, tragic. free agents are ruining the goddamed game.
any way i can get in on this that doesn’t involve packaging and postage?
@13 Well Microsoft Word say they’re synonymous and Microsoft rules the free world! Even our own cVillain is a Microsoft byproduct in a roundabout way. Synonyms!
@15: oh man… the hotness, I want.
@17: yes
@15: Oh you are so in trouble.
@19
while though i get the idea behind your linked-reply, i may feel i’ve endured adequate ongoing humiliation here?
are you entered? are the proper sides (sex, gender) of the three dissolute (heh-heh) couples also? Is Shen?
last i heard there were two Cvillains signed up for it?
Count me in among the dissolved in the last month camp.
I have absolutely no idea what Im doing now. Housework, mostly. Hawt.
@20 the most embarassing photo of me on the internet has already been found by kickball hooligans and displayed as their team picture.
@22: Me too. Let’s hold each other and cry. Hey, get yer hand off my tit.
@23: Yeah, but y’all don’t have THE CODE. Expect a pissy email in your inbox from the dude in that picture.
@23 there’s no alias attached to that picture, so the code was never violated, and the guy in question already told me he was cool with it.
@15: Is that belmont yo? Or maybe it’s oy?
@26 if the handsome man in question wishes to identify himself, i’m sure he would.
@25 I did not!
it’s thor, y’all.
which one though?
@29: Is it Thor or Thor #283
all of them. every dude in that photo is thor.
@31: No, no, no… that’s Thor #171.
there is no thor, only zuul
@29, 31, 32, 33 Kyle is nowhere in that picture people!
It’s a fucking leprechaun to be sure.
Pleeeeeeeeease B-yo, take the picture and photoshop in a leprechaun outfit…pleeeeaaaaassseeee.
hahahaha…. don’t forget to give him a really small crock.
@38 What type of shillelagh should he have? twisty or straight?
It curves. I heard that it does, I mean. Yeah.
@39 knobbly
@41 makes the knees wobbly
By request, quick and dirty…
Linkn go braugh
LMFAO
That should be the cVillain mascot
here is the pic
im sorry….when you take one look at this you just can’t NOT post this!?
Love it! LMFAO to tears.
Everyone’s looking at me cuz I’m laughing so loud
Oh brilliant!! Totally perfect. I also like the fluffy bunny attached to his ass.LOLLOL
all hail belmont yo, his mirth let me show it to you
@50 his shillelagh seems to curve left- do you agree?
10/10 B’ Yo. Way to close the work day!
By the way, when searching for leprechauns on the google, use a filter. Rule 34 definitely applies.
/even leprechauns is gettin more than me. harumph.
It’s hot in here and it ain’t the chorizo. I’m outta here.
Was that even necessary? See the last pic in the series…
http://cvillain.com/2008/03/16/pub-crawl-2008-was-a-wicked-awesome-success/
so who the fuck is this guy? gobbler?
i hope it’s gobbler.
Just don’t ask him where he keeps his lucky charms!!!!
yeah he totally looks like a Hokie
i’ve been assuming he’s gobbler for about a week… he hates wahoos and parlie with equal passion.
seriously, you guys are all dickheads. I hate the internet. I quit again, for at least the next few hours.
60: okay, I’m done quitting and I just read that and it doesn’t make any sense at all. Except the part where I hate the internet. that makes alll too much sense.
@60, 61: You need to get laid!
either that, or i needed not to get laid. but that’s a little too complicated to explain on a blag.
I know I’m late, but @14, Anchorman…nice, well played
Girth Brooks…do I know you?
That just sounds wrong.
I ask b/c I have a very funny inside joke using the name Girth Brooks with a handfull of people…I want to know if Girth Brooks on here is one of the handfull
i’d say girth brooks most definitely is a handful!
And it continues to sound worse…
budump, ching
To refer to the subject of the post, there are definitely some better places than others to pick up people around town. A friend of mine has this theory about our grocery stores. Apparently the hotter people shop at Teeter and then it goes downhill from there in this order: HT, Kroger, Giant, Food Lion.
Well to prove your friend’s point…I shop at Teeter.
/Setting myself up on that one.
@71 that’s absolutely true. me? i shop at the oak hill market, on village green. have you been there? the countertop displays are cascading sheets of blunt wraps; a panoply of flavors for your dry, seedy blunt-twisting pleasure. it’s no place for a lady.
but seriously, has anybody ever picked up a girl in a bar? you have? damnit. i like to pick up women at the clinic. lipo.
i hate everything i just wrote.
Apparently the hotter people shop at Teeter
The people just look hotter (food too) because they are the only ones on your list that use halogen lighting rather than florescent.
parlie, i met my wife in a bar.
@73: Oh but the best is those cases of beer they sell ripped in half and taped over. Carry one of those over to the Eagles Landing pool and chicks jump all over you.
But seriously, I never see hot guys at Integral Yoga. Which is too bad cuz they’d be all healthy.
@76 which brings me to my next point: has anybody ever NOT been laid in, at, or around the eagle’s landing pool? i didn’t think so.
I have slept with a dude I met at the Eagles Landing pool. All the hawt dudes hang out at the Woodlands pool now.
And just like that, a plug for our advertisers.
@79 so if I advertise you’ll plug me?
Um, I think Spicy Bear would need to kick me some of the profits for that. Kyle! Should I bang people to get them to buy advertising?
That’s hot
Should I bang people to get them to buy advertising?
Couldn’t be any worse than buying advertising to get people to bang you.
@81 Wait, you’ll sleep with me it I buy ads for Bang? Can’t they buy their own ads?
@84: No. And I sure hope all those be-haltered ladies are making the place enough dough to buy ads.
hahaha wow! LOL infinity! @81!
good ole shenanigans, right everybody!
@67 - i certainly am a handful. this is my real name though.
what is your inside joke?
@71 giant in pantops is totally different from giant on 29. kroger on 29 south of 250 is totally different from kroger north of 250. food lion is the same the world over.
Giant on Pantops= some hot people
Giant on 29= Old people
Kroger in Barracks= Old people
Kroger by 250= Some hot people
Im just posting this to get everyone out of shen’s box. Come on over here! Let’s get naked!
Hey B-yo, where to we go to get some ass in this town? I mean wooing. Psyche, I mean ASS.
Whole foods: has wealthy hippies and some hotness
Harris Teeter barracks road: now with student hotness
Kroger barracks rd is very hit or miss.
Food Lion 5th street- perhaps there is hotness but I’ve never seen it.
I saw sdigga in Reid’s once. Talk about a diamond in the rough. I have never seen any hot guys at WF though. Bel Air market on Ivy in the am has some good looking men.
Fuck if I know. Turns out I don’t even know how to flirt anymore, so Im fucked, or rather, not.
I am in a very dangerous and precarious position. As some may have noticed, I tend to post fairly personal shit at times and right now my mind is straight in the gutter. Im tryin so hard to keep my gutter thoughts off these boards, fairly successfully so far, but who knows? Maybe I’ll just go post a picture of my penis on craigslist to get it out of my system… Hah!
Has anyone actually ever met someone off of CL? It seems too risky. I used to get a fair amount of loving thanks to the myspaces awhile back but even that’s gotten sketch now.
@93 Well just cut me to the quick with that one . I have seen hotness at WF with a strong and strange horse riding subculture. They have the smug look of people who have always had ponies.
@92 “Well just cut me to the quick with that one” as well. It’s hard to find hotness among the renovation mess at the 5th St FL.
FOAN has hotness and oldness, but never the twain shall meet.
ugh. horse girls. questionable secksuality there. totally SFW.
/take care when google image searching “horse girls”
WF is cougars, Giant pantops is 20-something divorcees/apt-complex dwellers with identity problems and hanger-on working-it-out Exes (cf Shen’s did-the-pool-boy-at-Eagle’s-Landing post), kroger barracks is nurses.
in order of ease-of-access.
Tom Waits says: you never meet nice girls in coffee-shops.
you don’t. hairy dykes and loudmouth po-mo grad students.
hollywood video seems to have a huge payoff for minimal investment, get more ass than a toilet-seat there… stand and meaninglyfully study the back of some schlock indie-foreign film like PEderasto or whatever Shen mentioned a while ago. Or if a more adult-looking target, Un Homme Et Une Femme will do, since assuredly video-store pickup-able honies have some sad-singing tale of how they loved him so much but they just weren’t meant to beeee together (sniff) before they jambes-en-l’air.
if you want skank, miller’s is unmatched or bluemoon. if you want to pretend to know what a hoppenweiser india is, court square used to be good, but no leg is worth pretending to be a fine-beer snob.
i got a number at caspari the other day, even though was obviously there about another gal. what the hell is the matter with these people.
if you have a beard, don’t even bother. especially if you’re a chick, of course, but either way…
pull my finger and thanks for your feedback.
Whilst I have a passive disdain for the equestrian set, I do appreciate some of their equipment.
/is already slipping.
@99: You got digits while you were shopping for me? Where’s that bitch at?
@100: Come down into the gutter, it’s nice.
I only ever get numbers when I’m bartending. Which sucks. They just want free drinks or to tell their friends they fucked the bartender. Ugh. I’m going to Sneak Reviews tonight and I’m gonna stand in the Foreign section with a come-hither look and see what happens.
i ADORE horsey girls and their rich daddies who shoot gamebirds and feed me single-malts.
horsey-girls who are any good at it are surrounded by horsey guys who,
the horsey girls tell me,
are all guys-who-like-guys and coked out of their minds.
this probably doesn’t go for the local polo-club, who are standard dicks above and below,
and i’m sure we’ll have a post nextly about how someone did a few of them, etc.
@101
sneak reviews will avail you nothing. people worth-doing only LOOK at foreign films, and only rent them (except for the samurai flicks) to cover up the DIE HARD series, or Hugh-Jackman-Gets-Sassy-Working-Mom film they’re ACTUALLY going to watch.
@101
gee whiz, kiddo. where did i go wrong.
@101
i get digits buying drain-cleaner. changing tires. riding in ambulances.
what the hell is the matter with these people.
@102, @100, @98 i had a few equestrian GFs in my day, and each of them, unsolicited, confessed that they fell in love with horseback riding as an adolescent because every once in a while it gave them an orgasm.
@104: You must be the MAC DADDY
/you won’t get that if you’re old
@105
really? i always thought that an urban legend, but i believe you.
after a while though, the constant buffetting of the saddle against the various… ummm… essentials has a deadening effect, preventative in many cases of ever again etc. check the medical journals—there’s a name for it—tragic.
@general
could someone e-mail MC and FLOOZIE and get them on this thread?
Shen went back to her Ex, no longer eprsuasible by charm or wit.
persuasible
I went back to my Ex? Huh?
Come down into the gutter, it’s nice.
I don’t think cvillain, even with its claims of depravity and drunken co-mingling, is ready for that. I wouldn’t even have LaGrape to back me up…
Besides, it aint gonna make any difference anyway. I am trying to be more restrained in my ascii confessions.
/my mysteries, let me not show you them.
@107 not an urban legend.
got back together with?
i suffer from ‘low latent inhibition’, like the guy in Prison Break the series.
@111
what fun. does it last beyond that first riding-class season?
are there any horse-shows this weekend around here? i like tall boots and riding pants.
@112? There was no getting back together. And I don’t watch TV so not sure what the Prison Break ref means.
@113— depends on your seat in the saddle.
@115: Byard says his back is getting chafed from that saddle
Vibrators are cheaper than horses, and you only have to feed them batteries.
Then again, tub and shower faucets are even cheaper still.
@115 we should totes submit this one to mythbusters
i’d like to see Kari test it out for us
/nerd
@115
makes sense. posting must be hazardous if poorly seated. hope you are yourself careful.
@114
advance one googles, then.
sorry.
thought that would explain everything. my apologies.
so many apologies you’re collecting from me.
@116– hey, easy there.
@119– naturally, though I’ve been away from the sport for a few years.
@73 My wife (of 10 years now) and I met on adjoining barstools in St. Maarten’s Cafe on Cheap Beer Night.
(Can’t get much more romantic than that!)
@120: That’s what he said
where’s the goddam valium.
Who needs a horse? Just sit on the washing machine while it’s on.
@124
or the pool-boy.
@general
i know there’s ben a lot of debate about Cville needing a nudey-bar, but has anyone considered doing as nevada or wherever the hell that is where the mormon’s or quakers run brothels? don’t we have a whole gaggle of quakers here in town?
@general
there’s the goddam valium. take six do not pass ‘GO’.
@general
anyone downtown want to come stand in the rain and eat an ice-cream cone?
back in a bit to continue spreading my sunshine…
hahahahahaha.
@117, 124 i hear people work, too.
@124 i don’t think anyone would ever accuse you of “needing” the horse.
@125: Bu the never brought me espadrilles, so he’s history.
And did you know there’s a place in town you can call and for $200/hr a girl will come to your house, take off her top and rub your back?
@124 @125 or the pool-boy’s face
@125
thank you for making nice.
i didn’t know that. seems a bit steep, price-wise.
why would i want her to rub my BACK if her top were off? can’t see sh*t with my face down and buried in a towel.
Someone should speak to their Company Misson Statement drafter. Kyle’s the bidnessman around here:
THOR–how ’bout a buyout and corporate restructuring?
@130, 128
i meant @128 when i thanked you for making nice.
Kroger by 250= Some hot people
You flatter me, shen.
@132: Hot people there–Cuz we shop there