We just got a big letter from a Brandon Collins (presumably) complaining about the downtown mall re-bricking. It’s a very big issue and thought it should be shared with all cVillains. What do you think? We haven’t confirmed these names, so this could be a complete hoax. The letter…
Honorable members of Charlottesville City Council and City Manager Gary O’Connell,
We concerned citizens, taxpayers, and working people of Charlottesville call on you to cancel or alter the planned re-bricking and renovation of the Downtown Mall. It is our belief that maintenance and repair, rather than complete replacement, of the mall bricks can be done with less impact on business and workers, at a lesser cost to taxpayers.
Furthermore, we call for the 7.5 million dollars made available for the re-bricking project to be diverted, along with the attentions of city council and city manager, to an effort to seriously address the cost of housing in our city.
The estimated 7.5 million dollar cost of replacing the bricks will put an undue burden on taxpayers at a time when city government anticipates a budget crunch – perhaps even a shortfall – for next year, is reckless, and hard to fathom.
We add that there is no guarantee of use of a local workforce in the contract with developer Barton Malow. This, too, necessitates cancellation of the contract.
City Council and the Downtown Business Association have made little attempt to consult, or notify downtown businesses concerning the unfair patio space and have paid scant attention to the protestations and concerns of Mall business owners and workers, as evidenced at the meeting held Nov. 14 to discuss the matter.
Not allowing business to use their patio space until construction is complete is a backwards attempt to create fairness. The overall effect of this policy is to keep large amounts of money from being spent anywhere downtown, for a long period of time.
If businesses cannot operate fully, shoppers and diners will go elsewhere, since no one wants to shop or dine in a construction zone. This will effect employers’ ability to hire and retain employees already struggling under the weight of a high cost of living in Charlottesville. It will hurt tourism, and stifle tax revenue.
The proposed policy of equalizing patio space for restaurants is another backwards attempt to create “fairness.” But this penalizes older restaurants that risked opening on the mall early on. Restaurants with smaller clientele have no need for more space, as those with larger clientele cannot afford smaller patio space.
Moving patio space from their original spots outside of restaurants is another mistake that will create stress, confusion, and a few accidents.
This massive renovation project will stifle business downtown for the winter, and into spring. If the project lasts longer, the effects will be staggering. These businesses and their employees are already suffering the effects of continuous construction downtown. Slow business will hurt employers and employees and will lead to unemployment, underemployment, and lost wages for downtown workers. Ultimately, less tax revenue can be collected in the event of a massive business slow down on the mall.
Unemployment and lower tips for restaurant workers are likely outcomes of the current proposal for re-bricking. This worsens our economy, exacerbates the housing problem, and hurts the working people of Charlottesville.
Respected Charlottesville developers, suggest that the damage on the mall could be addressed by repairing the bricks in a continuous effort of maintenance. This could be done at a much smaller cost, estimated around $200,000 a year, with much less impact on downtown business and employment.
We call on Charlottesville City Council to divert it’s attentions and funds from the 7.5 million dollar re-bricking disaster to addressing the problem of housing costs in Charlottesville. As we continuously hear that council is concerned with low income housing, why is it that 7.5 million dollars is going to be spent on an over-priced maintenance issue while little is accomplished on the issues of affordable housing and homelessness? It is our view that council could spend money in a constructive way on addressing this issue rather than spending money for a project devastating to working people in Charlottesville already struggling to pay ever increasing rents.
Charlottesville City Council’s actions on re-bricking, and similar policies that support abstract notions of how our city should look, and which elites we are trying to attract and satisfy, contribute to the ever growing problems of poverty, housing, joblessness, homelessness, crime and gun violence. A belief that our community leaders are more concerned with spending large sums of money on cosmetic changes to attract tourists, corporate business, and wealthy newcomers has a direct effect on the psyche of low income citizens. When council says it needs to do something about these issues, and fails to do anything, people lose hope and lose sense of community. This is amplified when the one thing our leaders are doing is spending unimaginable sums of money on a project that has little support from the community.
While we see the need for infrastructure repair, we call on Charlottesville City Council to halt the total re-bricking of the Downtown Mall in favor of gradual repair and maintenance of the mall bricks for a lesser cost, and devotion of the massive amounts of money required for re-bricking to a serious and meaningful attempt to address the housing crises. We call on the citizens of Charlottesville to attend Charlottesville City Council meetings on the Mondays of December 1st and 15th to voice their concerns on the proposed re-bricking of the Downtown Mall.
Sincerely,
Miller’s Downtown¦Rapture¦Gravity Lounge¦Alakazam Toys & Gifts¦
Oyster House Antiques¦Twisted Branch Tea Bazaare¦Brandon Collins¦
Jennifer Tidwell¦Stephen Barling¦Jesse Breeden¦Reagan Greenfield¦
Morgan Moran¦Angel Krasnegor¦
More endorsements on the way!
If you would like to endorse, email brandoncollins@comcast.net
To sign the petition- visit Miller’s, Rapture, Sal’s
Related posts:
- City to Sell Original Downtown Mall Bricks to the Public During Restoration
- City Says Downtown Mall Rebricking on Schedule
- DO THE MATH, Downtown Mall Renovation Resisters
This letter should have been written before the renovation started. Just like the AIDS Day post, a day late and a dollar short.
tl;dr
executive summary:
re-bricking = poverty, joblessness, homelessness, crime and gun violence.
and $7.5 million dollars will fix all of our other problems without fixing the old gappy bricks.
personally i think re-bricking will help us all be happier.. think about how many women in heels in the future!
i agree this letter is kinda nonsense. next thing is we will see lawsuits against the city for damaging business… you watch. i’ll bet a nickel .
@1 maybe they thought they would be listened to at the meeting on nov. 14th. 8 days after groundbreaking.
I agree with them completely and will likely sign the petition. That said, man they sure could have used an editor’s once over on that letter. They say the same thing six different ways five diferent times. I amost didn’t make it though.
Maybe otterdung wrote it, but he’s probably buy repapering his home with cover’s of this week’s hook while muttering screeds.
/i kid because I love.
@3 think about all those ladies in heels you won’t be able to see sitting on patios all spring.
*busy*, ahem.
Right the fuck on!
It almost seems criminal to spend 7.5 million dollars on rebricking the mall given the current – and most likely future – state of the economy.
TL/DR. But hey look, it’s written by a band and some female armwrestlers!
it’s time. it’s time for me to stand up for all the others who won’t, and bravely ask this stupid question: what in the holy fuck does TL/DR mean?
no, i will not JFGI.
“too long / didn’t read”
nice typing anyhow.
i LOVE steve barling and jen tidwell, but they might watch them grammars next times.
this reminds me of the Universal Declaration of Human Rights (was that it?),
where 100 Nobel Prize winners drafted a statement to The Whole World
that reads like the back of a Count Chocula cereal-box.
{hell, i typed that before i read the comments—particularly @5:
BYo, milad… you know i’d have tweaked SOMEone’s nose
harder than these polite supplicants failed to do…}
OK,
First: I, Stephen Barling, did not write this letter.
Second: Brandon Collins is a real person, and a cellist, to boot.
Third: Thor, YOU are nonsense.
Fourth: Yes, this letter needs editing, bad.
Fifth: Overdressed drunk girls in heels can eat me. (hopefully)
Sixth: Yeah, a day late and a dollar short, no doubt. (and the bloody capitalists will ignore you anyway)
Then again (not that this would have prevented the re-bricking), I pitched this story to the Cvillain hotline like three weeks ago when downtown businesses alerted me to the impending crunch.
What this letter does not cover in enough detail is the intention to shrink larger patio spaces (watch out Miller’s and Rapture) in an effort to make the mall “more fair.” Also not detailed are plans to move patios AWAY from their restauraunts, so Miller’s’ patio will be up by Hamilton’s. (Sorry Hamilton’s.)
Then there’s the fact that the mall isn’t in that bad of shape.
It’s all a mess if you ask me.
@13
1. while it is really expensive and i am not a big fan of spending my money to brick shit, walking on the mall is a problem and tourism brings a lot of money to businesses which in turn supports the local economy. the idea that doing this contributes to poverty and the housing crisis is rubbish. i have no idea about the $7.5 million budget for it, but the people in the city office must look at the mall and realize it generates a ton of tax income for them. their logic = spend more $ on mall, increase tax revenue. if they didn’t do that analysis, then i quit.
2. we appreciate the pitch, but we don’t actually have reporters so it’s hard to go out and cover things. I believe this letter hit the inboxes yesterday which is why we published it. sorry, we should have credited you a long time ago with this.
3. time is overrated. i love it here because i can listen to what charlottesville people think. there are 20 sources where you can read about news right now.
a total mess, cripsy, the whole bloody plan. and cretinous given tax-rates and budget, etc.
moving patios is moronic. especially miller’s, which centers on the fountain and has provided me with twenty years of bliss. fortunately all of capshaws shitty restaurants are closing, so that’ll make some space.
there’s not a blessed thing wrong with the bricks now—i was surprised you guys even suggested the $200K ‘maintenance’ of the bricks. the more worn they get, the more ‘authentic’ the feel of the old mall. and if they get broken up, then they become sortof euro-cobbles.
Fifth–yes, quite. i enjoyed many of them FAR less than
you might imagine one would. but perhaps YOU can see their souls.
so Miller’s’ patio will be up by Hamilton’s.
So what happens when the alcoholic gutter punk dwarf with tourettes intermingles with Thornton Von Mandible the third?
Hilarity.
I may be in favor of this plan after all.
walking on the mall is a problem
Oh. Please. How so?
@14 in all these times we’ve discussed the bricks, i think the only person here incapable of walking is chartreuse.
zocalo’s patio is being shrunk too even though it’s not in anyone’s way.
there’s a $100K budget for informing people that the mall will be open during rebricking.
@16
dwarves scare the living shit out of me.
is there a wee-people on the Mall now?
Thor, I’m with you about the “affordable housing” angle. Sounds pretty ethereal if you ask me. (What does that mean, really?) That subject should have been left for a completely different thesis.
But the re-bricking is likely to cause hassles we have yet to consider. Remember how long it took to redo the street by Rapture? Years. And the plan for the Mall calls for it to be done by May. MAY? Really?
During this time the mall businesses have been informed that no patio will open until the entire Mall is finished. That means that the Nook has to wait until the Mudhouse is complete.
It’s a clusterfart of pamphlet proportions.
The term dwarf is insulting and non PC… I believe they now they prefer to be termed ‘vertically challenged with fucking enormous heads’.
Just so you know.
/I’m going to hell, and the devil is gonna be a dwarf.
@16 – let me heal you. have you ever stepped on the exploding water bricks? they squirt up your pants.
@19 – i totally agree that it’s a clusterfuck which is why the lawsuits will happen. maybe it’s an effort to be more “fair” to everyone. the downtown mall businesses have a huge benefit by being on the mall. where else do you have the sheer number and different types of patios? i just feel like people are complaining when they neglect a lot of the benefits they get.
/can Sean Tubbs get on here and explain everything for us?
@16 – let me
healheel youFTFY
@20
they can see in the dark and make things move with their thoughts,
speak to and understand small animals, and probably levitate when nobody’s looking.
that shit ain’t right.
I cannot walk by Rapture without getting stuck. How about they just fix that part?
@24 By getting rid of the bar?
@24 don’t walk by rapture. walk on the south side there. problem solved.
i work on the DT mall. i have to say – walking on the un-renovated parts of the mall is pretty awful compared to the small parts they have already renovated. the bricks are more level, fewer cracks, a better surface overall. and yes my feet feel the difference. yes, walking on the un-renovated parts is completely possible and navigable, but i can’t tell you how many of my summer shoes get caught in cracks when i walk up and down it every day. in winter shoes and boots, it’s not so noticeable, but the lack of a level walking surface is still a slight irritation.
that being said, i had no idea about the patio plans. that seems odd and a large overreach of plans to renovate the DT mall.
i do appreciate that they are not renovating the newly-bricked area near the Paramount and by the pavilion. those are perfectly fine.
i agree something should be done about housing … but i’m not so sure how much $7.5 million could accomplish with the cost of land and taxes in this downtown area. and who would they give it to? the private corporations who have Section 8 housing in their limits? to the police to effectively enforce the law and arrest those who make public housing dangerous to live? to make Friendship Court grass even more green than it is now? to better police 9th and Page where 5 (i think) shootings have happened this year, despite all the efforts at gentrification in that area?
edit:
i meant 10th and Page – not 9th and Page
but i’m not so sure how much $7.5 million could accomplish
Think out side the box, ED! That could buy a huge fleet of segways, which could be parkd all around the perimiter of the mall. One could hop on one and zip all around. There could be an electronic fence of sorts that would prevent them from being taken off the mall. And saturday nights at 1:30 am would be ever so entertaining!
/fuck it. Im running for city council.
@29.. i know why don’t we paint them yellow too?
They are opening up the fountain areas. The nook, which surrounds a Mall fountain will no longer be able to do so.
As to the size of spaces, there are places on the mall unable to have a patio presense because others havbe so much space and/or are in front of their business.
Also requiring patios to spruce up a bit. The plastic chain link and ugly wait stations will have to go.
As to using them money for affordable housing, WTF? What is their suggestion? Or are they just trying to distact? Welcome to Cville, where no one wants anyone to build anymore but thinks that prices should come down. Guns or butter 101.
@29 That would also preclude high heeled shoes from getting stuck in the bricks, obviating the need for the rebricking in the first place. Its too good a plan.
Also, could we please shut the hell up about “times like these” and “in this economy” and all of the other similar platitudes that have become as ubiquitous as “in my humble opinion” on the interwebs? If the mall rebricking is a bad idea its a bad idea regardless of the state of the economy. If altering patio space and allocation is a bad idea, its a bad idea regardless. Lets just address the ideas on their merits. If we paid more attention to the merits of ideas all the time rather than just in a “harsh economic climate” then we’d not have to appeal to the harsh economic climate as the reason not to do something stupid. We’d just point to the merits or lack thereof and that would be appeal enough.
Or something.
OMFG Chris is actually parlie
WTF Floozy is actually Sain.
Who the fuck is Sain?
@ 32 Thats what I was thinking! And at the average base price of $5k per mid range segway, we could get 1,500 of them for 7.5 mil. Should be more than enough…
I know I would go to the DTM more if I could scooby around on one of those tard proof people movers, especially if I wasn’t the only one. And really especially if I was hammered.
There could be spontaneous bouts of jousting… Oh my.
Advertising for DTM businesses could be sold on them to offset the electricity costs. And tell me a non pedestrian pedestrian mall wouldn’t be a tourist draw…
/get me the mayor on the phone.
Why do city councils, in general, get such goofy ideas? The Nook can’t put out a table until the Mud House is done? Geez.
But I wouldn’t worry about affordable housing. The economic collapse will, I believe, start fixing this shortly, along with a lot of other problems.
sure, needed editing,
time was an issue.
To be clear, the names on the letter are folks who have endorsed it, not necessarily who wrote it. The idea was to include all the problems and concerns folks had expressed to me. The patio space issue will likely be addressed, there is a petition with over 1000 signers concerned solely with patio space. You can sign at Miller’s, Rapture, or Sal’s.
The other issues have been passed to me by a variety of folks and given that 30 more endorsements came overnight, I’d say that the connection to affordable housing is clear to folks struggling with rent FOR YEARS.
I do wish this opposition could have started earlier, many people, including myself, seemed surprised by the details of the plan. Council and DBA made attempts to consult businesses, but not the general citizenry, once word got out, people were pissed.
so sorry to offend the intellects of cvillian. com posters, maybe we should stick to the segway conversation…
i was going to say what chris said @32, but then he said it first and left me without a job, in a harsh economic climate. with times like these, who needs times… not like these?
Brandon…. intellects?cvillains? ROFLMAO
The project could easily have GENERATED REVENUE over time. Yep- easily. I’m also fed up. I stood up at the meeting w/ an obvious idea- even talked to Huja about it one day (he seemed receptive at least.)
Here’s how it works…we’ve all seen it. Anyone who has been to a city w/ some forward thinking folks have seen their pedestrian malls bricked w/ dedicated, or simply inscribed, bricks that the people gladly pay for (and, given all the pretentiousness around c’ville, folks would f’ing line up to fork over 50 bucks per brick.) All you do is take the orders/money and then use the new (inscribed) bricks for “repairs as needed” until the whole thing is done over many years. Shit- they should have been doing that for years as they’ve bricked around the courthouse and some side streets- the dips.
So, at the meeting, I stood up and asked why this wasn’t being investigated. The answer: “it’s not in keeping w/ the original Halperin design.” What nonsense- it wouldn’t have changed the overall visual lay out. It was clear to me the decisions had been made and nothing was going to change.
Fires me up that this is all being hamfisted, and at such a cost (and a clear statement as to f’ed up priortities.)
This is my instant response to this issue. It makes me enjoy “Mayberry” more.
“I guess Cville governmental types never have gone to Richmond’s cobble stoned street area Shockoe Slip. Cary St is cobbled for about three blocks and is a major traffic arty which has been maintained since they uncovered the 18th century cobles in the 70’s. When an area needs repair they fix that area. They do not close off the street for half a year. Maybe Cville needs some corrupt bureaucrats to actually get things done correctly instead of some high minded geniuses that are lost in god knows what trifle. And my god, the carbon foot print of a total redo vs. repair! You f#@king idiot greenies government buffoons don’t know your asses from a hole in the ground or “emotionally satisfying” science from common sense. Long live the leader and the revolution!”
Although very screedy, Being a Richmond native and long time “Hook” resident I can atest to the moronic nature of the “lofty minds” of city hall leaders and the corupt city councilors in the capital.
i like the term “emotionally satisfying science.” i really do. makes me feel nice.
fester, you’re hired.
Is it just me or does anyone else think that the Downtown Mall’s bricks are fine? Admittedly I only rarely wear heels, but I’ve not noticed a problem with the bricks….
@38 editing would have helped for clarity’s sake but more importantly, there are just too many serious issues loaded into the letter. You’re addressing at least 1) rebricking, 2) patio space allocation and location, 3) high rent prices, and 4) homelessness.
All of these are important and need to be discussed and addressed. But its very difficult to figure out what the proposals are in here. It looks like there are some really good arguments against rebricking but very few details about the seemingly attractive on-going maintenance alternative.
Changing the locations and sizes of patio spaces on the Mall seems to be a separate issue from rebricking. The only overlap appears to be that the rebricking will cause patio spaces to be closed/disallowed for some unclear period of time. Again, really vital for the businesses but not the same issue as rebricking.
Homelessness and affordable housing are areas that clearly need attention in our city. That downtown business owners are concerned with it is heartening. Packaging the appeal with the arguments about unrelated city council decisions (rebricking and patio space issues) makes it sound like its simply a convenient heart string to tug rather than a serious proposal. To be clear, I believe the signatories on the letter to care about housing and the homeless. I also believe them to care about their own business and making a good living themselves and taking care of their own employees. I think separating the discussions would be more helpful. Basically, make the argument against rebricking (and it sounds like there’s a good one to be made and a reasonable possible alternative) as an individual thing.
@ belmont yo: segways, what an awesome idea – kudos!!
@42 – the cobblestone areas in Richmond use a different technique for maintenance and upgrade … and are horribly UN-level. it is a jarring experience to drive over them and walk on them. but it is historically accurate, i suppose.
additionally, an entire re-do with better mortar and connect techniques, fewer spaces in between bricks, and a better graded experience overall, will end up reducing needed maintenance in the future (not to mention all the heels and shoes getting stuck and ankles twisted) – that should not be overlooked. not saying it will offset the footprint of the entire re-do, just saying it’s something to be considered.
@41 – that’s a nice call on brick donations with names … weird they totally dismissed it as an option. maybe then the angry letter wouldn’t have been needed and we could have put $7.5 million for use in segways!
@32 Chris – how about we NOT stop talking about the current state of the economy? Especially since it’s a state like we’ve never seen before.
Here’s the thing, if it were boomtimes redux, the city coffers would be flowing, and a project like this would make plenty of sense. However, when budgets are getting slashed, it’s not wise to piss away 7.5 million on bricks when there are more important places to spend the money.
The state of the economy should be taken into consideration when considering priorities.
I’ve attended a number of meetings (all open to the public) on the rebricking. They started almost a year ago. The process has been very open. While I can understand the frustration on the part of shop owners (most especially over the patio space, which is a separate issue and one on which economic interests are at stake; still seemed that as of the meeting a couple of weeks back that the planners were open to ideas, so I truly wish the shop owners luck), however the time for opposing the rebricking has passed. Contracts, with dates included, have been signed. Period. Not a lot that can be done on that, now. Also, remember that a good chunk of this money for this project comes from directed grants. You aren’t allowed to move it from “mall renovation” to “housing.” You either use it for the intended purpose or wave goodbye to the cash.
No, these aren’t the loser rebrickers who did the rebricking near Rapture. As the city planners stated, “That was a lowest bid project.” This time, they went with the folks who built JPJ, a group known for bringing in projects sooner than planned and under budget. Also, there was no concrete slab base in the area by Rapture. REALLY complicated things. No such problem on the mall.
The manner in which the rebricking is to be done is different, too. Pretty sure they’re still doing a block at a time. But they’re tearing a strip down the center of the mall and rebricking that first. So you’d still be able to walk on either side. After they complete the center portion, they will then do either the north side (or south, can’t remember which), and then switch when that’s done. So only a third of the mall block, length-wise, is under construction at any time. Access to each business, even when their third is under construction will be uninterrupted (they’ll set up pathways), except for the day the bricks by the front door are replaced. Disruption should be pretty minimal, from what I can tell. They also aren’t putting up big ass walls around the construction areas. They went with shorter walls, so that shoppers or diners can still see businesses across the mall, even during construction.
I also take issue with the idea of repairing, rather than replacing, as a good one. Morter simply isn’t a permanent solution. The mall itself is a testimony to that. They’ve tried to keep up with it. In practice, you can’t. And it’s more than ladies in high heels affected. The sight-impared struggle with the bumpy, uneven surface. The handicapped have trouble with their wheelchairs. Seniors have trouble with their walkers. Parents have trouble with carriages. Vendors and suppliers have trouble with their carts. A lot of people benefit from a smoother, morterless surface for a much longer time.
Total props to the “dedicate a brick” idea, though! If you ask me, THAT part should be considered. The main problem may be that we’ve already warehoused the bricks. The idea was to buy ‘em all in bulk, at lowest possible price, and use as needed. Not sure if that has been done already. Probably, since they begin bricking next month. I’m not sure how you indicate a donation in a brick that’s already been set. I’ve got other quibbles with their choosing the more expensive brick of the two options considered. I also wish that recycling as many of the bricks as possible on the mall had been considered (they will be recycled, but for other purposes). Would have been nice to reduce the number of needed new bricks by the number of salvageable bricks.
Damn. Didn’t mean to write the world’s longest post. Just thought that, since I have managed to sit through a ton of the decision process, I’d at least relay what I’d heard.
/the more you know…the more I should probably shut up.
Damn, all it took was some brick talk to get ThatGrrl to come out of lurkeration.
ThatGrrl.. that’s all incredibly helpful. Thank you!
@50 Hey, I still want to be able to wear stiletto heels on the mall, someday. It’s important!
@51 No problem at all. I just apologize for the excessive wordification. I’m looking into wordectomies (with heavy sedation).
@47 If rebricking the mall really is “pissing away 7.5 million” then it would never be a good idea. If during boomtimes people paid attention to these kinds of projects and opposed them as “pissing away” money, we’d either have more effectively addressed other issues with that money or we’d have saved it such that now we wouldn’t have to spend so much time fretting over “these times” and “the current state of the economy.”
If a project like this would, in fact, make plenty of sense at any point then the argument against it now is only that there are more important things to spend money on. That doesn’t seem to be the argument most are making.
Either way, the appeals to “times like these” don’t address the actual question of whether its a good idea. Its simply a convenient thing to point at.
the contracts have NOT been finalized, while businesses can open during construction, patios can’t until the project is complete. Not awful through winter, but when the weather breaks and the project isn’t completed on time….
@52
“Hey, I still want to be able to wear stiletto heels on the mall, someday. It’s important!”
As well you should, but really need taxpayers bear the
burden for sexually-provocative fashion-forward flooze-wear?
Can’t you just wear your flats/espadrilles/Tretorns TO the bar,
then slip on your fuck-me-right-now-dammit heels in the foyer
to then sashay and cakewalk around X-Lounge, Blue-Calo, etc.?
@54
while everything you say is sensible and clever and well-put/well-reasoned,
and i am grateful for your initiative in framing and sending and defending the letter…
it’s terribly disconcerting to have you talk about silly civic-improvement shit
when i’ve been present during your fucking brilliant otherworldly God-touched cello-playing.
it’d be like hearing Bach lecture about sanitation and waste-removal.
I think re-bricking the downtown mall doesn’t go far enough. I demand the area be paved in travertine and lined with a two-story Corinthian colonnade. I want the Omni hotel leveled and replaced with a temple to Bacchus.
@57
and there’s no reason at ALL that water street shouldn’t be…. WATER.
gouge and dredge, and make us a nice broad grass-banked canal with vaporettos and gondolas and shit.
@54 At the meeting held in Cityspace on Friday, Nov. 14, the city planners said that the contracts for rebricking had been signed. I’m sure that other aspects of the renovation haven’t been completely finalized, but the planners were pretty clear on the contracts being a done deal.
@55 That was a joke. As I said in my original post, there are others with actual, serious need of a flat, even walking surface. The sight-impaired, the handicapped in wheelchairs, those with walkers, people pushing carriages, vendors or suppliers pushing carts all have need of better surfacing. Currently, the mall is not ADA compliant. It will be, after the renovation.
@59
shit. wheelchairs shouldn’t have any trouble with bricks, uneven or not.
seems like it’d be easier just to run a meandering concrete strip four feet wide down the center of the mall for the others, and be done with it. or issue them Segways at the Visitor-Centre.
@60 Can I haz Segway? My toesies get tired in those stilettos…
are rickshaws allowed on the Mall?
the city could subsidize a few of them to haul around the lame, halt, and blind.
and the be-stilettoed and blind-ass-drunk.
All in all, it’s just another brick in the mall.
Groan.
@63 IF YOU DON’T EAT YOUR TARTARE YOU CAN’T HAVE ANY AIOLI
/wins today
@63: That song is now stuck in my head. Thanks sooooo much.
@65 But what about the sweetbreads? And the Norwegian bottled water?
@66 Me to. The bastard!
@62 i have observed a rickshaw outside blue light.
@68
problem solved.
city-sponsored rickshaws running 24/7. they can sell advertisements on the sides to offset cost.
be-heeeled wommins can dangle their bare legs out the side and see what male fauna (fauno?) sticks to them.
more endorsements-
Migration: A Gallery…Joia Sellam…Becky Robinson…Jerry Simmons
Jenny Bass…Laura Covert…Louis Schultz…Daniel Overstreet…
Alexandra Cheff…Dawne Garrett…Andrew Groner…Dawn Story…Laura and Rob Jones…Sara Bullard…
Leo Daugherty…Stu Gilchrist…Emily Anderson…Slava Krushka…Eleanor Gould…Andrea Parker
more endorsements- The Society for the Gratuitous Use of Ellipsis
/I keed
the society for the gratuitous use of the ellipses raises funds in support of the war on meaningful transitional phrases. if you support them, in ten years you won’t even be able to use a comma.
“E-Prime” names the English language without the verb “to be”. Since the publication of Bourland’s article in 1965, numerous article, etc., have appeared testifying to the effectiveness of E-Prime as a discipline that encourages… the user to write, speak, and think more clearly and accurately.. E-Prime allows users… to move beyond a two-valued Aristotelian orientation that views the world through overly simplistic terms such as “true-false”, “black-white”, “all-none”, “right-wrong”.
Q: I have heard that if we learn to write, speak, etc. in E-Prime that we will AUTOMATICALLY reduce the level of dishonesty, bigotry, etc., in our lives. How dos this come about?
etc. end of quote.
Well, I say these people don’t what Aristotle is, and furthermore, if we lose Aristotle (and his relief mechanism, Socrates/Plato), then the terrorists have won.
On Friday, December 5 Charlottesville mayor Dave Norris announced that the proposal to reduce the outdoor patio spaces for all restaurants on the Mall to 700-square feet, following the completion of the $7.5 Mall re-bricking project in May, would be scrapped.
@74 Well, that’s a good thing, I hope.
It means you can still drink $15 a glass champers at Siips in the towering shadow of a giant CVS sign for discount tampons and buy one get one free adverts for one-dose-overnight yeast infection combipaks. WooHoo.
Ahh, the downtown mall at it’s finest. Yesterday, walking from York Place to the barbershop by SNL, I was asked seven times for change by homeless people, and three people tried to bum a cigarette for me. I mind that more than monistat ads, personally.
Ugh.
You need a slyly cunning Halsey Minor disguise…. not even the hardened homeless and economically disparaged folk would ask him for a scheckel considering the fiscal entrenchment and mire he is allegedly drowning amidst.they should sell Halsey wigs and button-downs on the mall to repel the seething masses.
What a splendid idea, Otterdung. I’ll hop right to it.
@17. think about zocalo vs. neighbor petit pois. both excellent at their game.
however, i think that is a great example of the proposed re-distribution. both would get the same sized patio.
mmm-kay. petit pois’s entire kitchen (is open to see through the door way) and is about 1/3 the size of zocalo’s.
but if the well intentioned (?) redistribution happens- the two kitchens are supposed to feed equal amounts of patrons in a timely and manageable manner?
/sounds a little less than free-market.
/ or even respectful, logical, logistical or reasonable.
I wasn’t aware that they distributed patio space based on kitchen size.
they distributed it upon whatever “ever” had been going on as far as i know, but giving every restaurant the same size patio space just seems a little unneccessary. how about :
splendora’s = rapture
thanks for picking up my slack, Floozy! you write for me better than i do.
i would have said ill-fitting sportcoats not button-downs, but it was close enuf for contempt.
it seems to me that the patios are all appropriate as they are so good call not changing them. except for sal’s. their should get taken away. siips probably whines because they have to be in front of cvs, but that’s what you get for being a latecomer (& sucking).
/glad we found someplace else with snails.
I’m sorry darlingest Ot… I promise I will not do it again. I was drunk and mischievious… forgives me? btw email me at boozyfloozy999@gmail.com. I have a prezzy for you.
@85
Not at all, darling!!!! I was sincere in my thanks!
your capital ‘O’ postings are uniformly more funny and clever than mine,
when either in parody of me or in continuance of the themes I broadcast here.
e-mail you? why, but yes, of course.
should i do so as myself, or as anonyme ‘otterdung’?
okay, next-
let’s see if we can suggest this world class city of ours can think a bit more worldly on how to spend 7.5 million dollars (if they must) for the better living for the community as a whole.
(transportation, housing, education, daycare, nutrition…new bricks?!)
@87
perhaps a new post with a few suggestions and a poll?
@87 fake grass & lots of light-up palm trees so charlottesville isn’t so gray for the international wine experience, & they can better replicate the sobe wine fest?
@87 we could begin with:
* pay off halsey’s debt to sotheby’s to relieve the SHAME he’s brought on our fair city.
* pay for HM to finish the hotel (named after the chain of Arab luxury hotels) he’s MAYBE building, and make it a membership-only place like Club 216 and for the same crowd—one of the members is BOUND to be a hairstylist, and maybe HE can get HM into the clipping-chair.
* make water street into a canal with gondolas and moustachioed italian gondoliers from our sister-city there, and grassy ‘weekend at grand jattes’ (the painting HM SHOULD have bought) banks.
* fund Halsey to sue the local painter for using the title of the painting halsey almost owned for his exhibit.
* create a citywide Matt Rosenberg Day to celebrate frivolous lawsuits and the culture of moneygrubbing this new time of ‘economic austerity’ is likely to launch.
* provide separate-but-equal drinking fountains on the Mall for heterosexual caucasian male omnivores.
* city buyout of the rumored-to-be mortgage-defaulting FAILING live-arts building, donate it to CLAW, let current LA staff do street theater like the Diggers/Bread-and-Puppet folks to better and broader spread their post-mod obscurantist weird themes, aesthetics and ideologies.
* construct a 200-foot tall monument of Jefferson on the Mall (like Sadam Hussein had), with an erection pointing towards Monticello to guide tourists.
The brick project has already started, get over it. Two spots are under construction as we speak, and two are done, on 5th Streets SE and NE.
officially, that is not THE rebricking project.
/reads old media.
@90
like the title of my first grade reading book, seven is magic.;)
but actually, i was thinking a little more community like actual better public transportation (more accessibility(locations), more frequent runs (every 20 minutes v. once an hour)…
health care, stable food banks/community vegetable gardens, any sort of education to raise the standard of living for the working class hero…
bread and puppets just for fun- maybe a guest appearance by eddie izzard while we are at it.
extend the UVA-Downtown Trolley schedule to run at least until 3 am, after bar-closings.
and add a loop from Downtown/Corner to WaffleHouse on Fifth Street between 2:00 a.m. and 4 a.m.
a few more endorsements-
William Mick…Walter Hoffman…Downing Smith…Sarah Bordeau-Rigterink
Don’t tread on me.
*crickets*