You need to immediately add (434) 202-5062 to your contacts. Why? Because we’ve partnered with some sweet local people who have setup an online rant line for Charlottesville.
Only, instead of you waiting a week for an intern to make up rants to fill a page in a newspaper, we will record your voice, scramble it and publish it on charlottesvillerant.com as soon as we can.
We dare you to make drunken rants this weekend. The best selection of rants will be posted to cVillain come Monday. The winner will get one million cVillain bucks which are worth exactly zero (unless you get a bailout).
[pic from beccaple]
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Tagged as: charlottesville complaint, charlottesville rant, complain, number, phone line
Ug!, is more ranting really needed?
@1 Are you ranting about rants?
If there’s one thing that this town really needs, it’s yet another place for passive-aggressive folks to spew their smug venom from the safety of the anonymous phone call.
Thanks for the heads-up.
Hmmm… ranting that caters to the illiterate. Now there’s a worthy cause.
I propose this line be used for pure pornography.
/I see you there in your blue tshirt and turquoise man band watch… hur hurr…
pure pornography
Am I intrigued by the oxymoronic nature of this phrase or am I just horny? Can’t decide.
/Have to agree somewhat that yet another enabler for the snarktastic and unfortunately mostly inarticulate (thinking of the C-Hook..whichever one it is) ranters of this city is unwarranted.
clevuh. i’m curious to hear how the voices scramble. has anyone the slightest doubt that Floozie’s Afrikaans accent will be adequately masked?
i suppose Cvillain will do Classifieds, I Saw You, Sudoku next? We’re beating print-media to a pulp—and LOOK, in addition to repeatedly scooping Cville and Hook and Daily Progress…WE EVEN HAD A LAWSUIT filed against us before HOOK did !!!!!
Next step—
to get sodomized regularly by alien invaders like the staffers of Echo do (that’s the new-age one, right), and write about or YouTube putting quartz-crystals in our vajajays to promote world peace and macrobiotic dieting.
Next step—to get sodomized regularly by alien invaders
Way ahead of you.
i’m curious to hear how the voices scramble
Ohh, hush hush, keep it down, down… voices scramble.
They have some sort of a pitch shifting thing going on. I guess you could really call in with anything to that site. Looks like someone already has. I’m just glad to have somewhere (else) to drunk dial.
@8
i wonder if sodomy-by/with-aliens is covered in Virginia Statutes. I think it may be in the clear b/c technically they wouldn’t be either human or animal. This may be an excellent ‘out’ for some of the troubled ‘differently-sexed’ persons out there—and really, the issue of ‘gay-marriage’ wouldn’t come up either. In the Tabloids, you rarely hear about aliens ‘catching’, only about them ‘pitching’—not sure the kids from Alpha Centauri would do so well in our prison-system.
funny to quote Missing Persons in response to a comment about Alien Abductions!!!
HTML ganked from http://blog.gooddesignweb.com. How local can you get?
“I can html for number one best united states!”
And as soon as I can rip the flash audio out of these post, lordy lordy, its gonna be a sample fest!
Look for your rant on an upcoming cd, bitches.
I’m the first rant on there? Awesome!
“sodomy-by/with-aliens”
why do you think it’s called ASTRO-Glide?
Zing !
@11 that makes me horny.
@12 Ahahaha I’d say whose the rants about but I don’t want to get pistol whipped.
And as soon as I can rip the flash audio out of these posts
Soundflower > Audacity > mp3. Now that wasn’t so hard…
/god I love the tubes
what a fantastically dumb idea!
What happens if you talk all garbled to begin with, and they run it through the garbling machine?
i’ll tell you what happens; the same thing that happens when you google “google.” you disappear in the night and resurface 3 years later as a homeless schizophrenic in kirkuk. don’t fuck with the garbler rant blog machine.
DO IT!
and write about or YouTube putting quartz-crystals in our vajajays to promote world peace and macrobiotic dieting.
Ohmyfuckingod I almost died just now. Still trying to catch my breath. jesus effing christ otter you are pure fucking genius.
i lov/heart u lrant line/////
The voice of the ranter on “Musicians Head Ass” sounds exactly like the recorded voice on the “Welcome” message from Spicy Bear.
/who knew such anger doth there abide?