I am wont to take cabs on evenings when I’ve dipped into the wonderous world of spirits. And I highly recommend chatting up your taxi driver. Charlottesville cabbies have some great stories.

One cabbie I talked to told me about cleaning up after a drunk girl did “The Vom” all over the backseat and floor of his pristine ride.

“Really?” I asked. “That’s awful. What did you do?”

“Well,” he replied, “I stopped the cab and kicked her and her friend out. And of course then they had to pay the clean-up fee.”

Yep. Clean-up fee. How much you ask?

According to this cabbie, it was $300 for vomit. (Alas, I didn’t inquire about the going rate for other, um, fluids or solids.) And, even at that price, he said he’d be losing money by spending his Friday night cleaning his cab rather than catching fares.

Word to the wise: don’t vomit in cabs. It’s just rude. And expensive, apparently.

[Note to the reader: All conversations contained herein have been reconstructed according to an admittedly hazy memory. But I’m dang sure about the $300 part. And the part where he kicked the girl out, which is just hilarious.]

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I saw something that really ticked me off this afternoon on the mall. Father and daughter were walking their two labs, black and chocolate, on the mall. The black lab is 10 months old (puppy or no?), and while they are walking in the middle of the mall the black lab just starts peeing as he/she walks, the owner (father) looks back and just keeps walking with the dog. Curb your effing DOG!

This is the culprit:

That larger than life sign clearly says clean up after your dog, you jerk. That puppy put like half a gallon of pee in the middle of the downtown mall. How effing rude! If you see the owner, yell at him. I am tired of dog owners that have no control of their pets. Maybe Scowly will pee on you next time.

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