With a little help from our friends at Holy Taco, I will try and guide you single folk for your upcoming fiestas

1. Do your homework:  hopefully there is a facebook page setup for the party.  if not create one.  this will help with rule #2.  once the group is set, stalk and befriend your choicest cuts of meat.  spring break pictures from college are a good benchmark to stalk on, however if college was more than 6 months ago their bodies could have changed drastically….for the worse.  you have been warned.   make friends ahead of time.  look at their pages, and wikipedia every one of their hobbies.  its not every day a guest at a party meets another person with the same interest in 14th century bible collecting.
2. Make an entrance:  your goal is to have everyone know who you are within the first 30-45 min of the party.  remember, time is of the essence and there is definitely a deadline (midnight).  try to be memorable but not stupid, cute but not cocky, funny but not cheesy
3. Watch for the alcoholics:  after the point of no return, people who have had too much to drink are flipping annoying.  know how to look for those and avoid them….you do not want to dilly dally
4. Look for desperate people:  as the night mosies on, pheremones and good looksdo their part to bring pairs together.  for the rest of us its a free for all.  look for the wall flowers and draw them out, like picasso paints…or something
5. Prepare yourself:  be ready to entertain your target be they sober or drunk.  rule #1 helps with this.  you should know the family tree, favorite book and whether or not they are married to their best friend from high school
6. Make someone feel really good about themselves:  if you are seriously considering this step you most likely have not followed steps 1-5.  either repeat this exercise all over again, or find someone with something seriously wrong with them and pretend they are 150% ok.  if you act this way when you have a drink in hand, the other person will assume you are drunk, you have no inhibitions and are speaking veritas
7. Prepare your exit:  once you are ready to seal the deal you better have  Jeeves waiting for you, or Wahooptie on stand by.  there is a fine line between someone seriously considering going home with you and realizing they are about to go home with you, then snap out of the funk and run away, far far away….

happy hunting
[pic from motleypixel on flickr]

Popularity: 12% [?]

Last night was rainy and cold and called for a movie in bed with some red red wine. I accidentally ended up watching this movie about this sex club in NY called “The List”. Basically if you were hot or powerful, you got to be on The List and people would call you and say, “Are you free tonight?”. If you answered yes, they told you to meet them at a certain hotel and you went and knocked the boots, NSA, no names.

After the movie, there was some commentary from the director and a sex therapist, declaring that sex clubs like the one in the movie do exist! All over America! They may not be a list per se but everywhere around the country, they stated, people are finding ways to anonymously bump uglies.

Which leads me to wonder…are there any sex clubs in C-ville? »Read More

Popularity: 16% [?]

I have heard from various people around town about the prevalent use of cocaine.  This surprised me quite a bit!  Quoting a local:

If you are out past 2AM partying, odds are everyone is coked up

Seriously?  Maybe we are a little-big city!  What brought this to light was an article today from the Daily Mail that reports cocaine and ecstacsy deaths are up 1,200% since 1993.

‘People think they can copy celebrities and do a quick line because it doesn’t have the same stigma as other class As but it’s actually just as destructive. ‘People are often ignorant of the risks of combining alcohol with cocaine for example, which can increase the risk of liver and heart disease, strokes and epilepsy.

‘The increase in deaths among men in their 30s and 40s is worrying. It suggests that more people are continuing to experiment with drugs well into adulthood.

Do you powder your nose?

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Popularity: 23% [?]

How ’bout it “Cvillians?” What are your daily doses of dramatic woo-ing? The shopping spree at the Fashion Square Mall that turns into mental undressing of the guy or girl next to you that by fate, turns into the one you snuggle up with that night, or the incredible specimen of the opposite sex that your friends introduce you to at Blue Light? Charlottesville has been rated numerous years as one of the best places to live in the United States. People come here from all over to live, find a job and settle down. A place of excitement, beautiful rolling country, and wealth. A balance of innocence like Fridays After 5 and the slight corruption of Club 216 that make C’ville sit still on its pendulum and give the people the chance to sway. What could be a better place to find love, sex, a significant other and the romance of your life than a place that is so balanced like this small city, big town? It may lack the splendor of the sky-scraping buildings of New York City and it doesn’t have the rushing ocean breeze of a marine paradise but what it lacks in the obvious it has in its intricacies and distinct personality that one can only understand and be part of after residing here for a good amount of time. There are unique stories all around C’ville of romance that take place in this inimitable town that we, as locals, experience. So “Cvillians”, let’s hear those passionate stories that stimulate the hearts of anyone who cares enough to be touched by it!

Popularity: 26% [?]

A recent study published in Addiction has verified what we all suspected is true, that “Beer Goggles” are real.  The pun of the day: “Beauty is in the eyes of the beerholder.”  We’ve all experienced that rush of discovering someone after it’s late and we’ve had one too many drinks.  Come morning time or the coffee meet-up the next day, you decide, well that’s an ugly one.

The study measured individuals’ responses to pictures when inebriated and found a significant alcohol consumption enhancement effect only for attractiveness ratings of opposite-sex faces.  I am not sure whey you actually need to do a study for this.

Additionally, there was another study which found that The Pill negatively affects women’s abilities to find genetically fitting mates!  Unfortunately, for the 82% of women who have used The Pill at some time in their lives, this means that during the time they take the pill it creates a bodily-state that is post-pregnant (or something like that).

The lead researcher, Stewart Craig Roberts explained:

The results showed that the preferences of women who began using the contraceptive pill shifted towards men with genetically similar odors…when women are pregnant there’s no selection pressure, evolutionarily speaking, for having a preference for genetically dissimilar odors.  And if there is any pressure at all it would be towards relatives, who would be more genetically similar, because the relatives would help those individuals rear the baby.

Genetically similar odors can mean potential problems with offspring.

Moral of the two studies?   If you get drunk and take the pill, you will have an ugly, genetically flawed clone baby.

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Popularity: 49% [?]

A little birdie sends in a link for a “postie poo.” After that heading, shenanigans, I’d publish anything.

So the news is that 50% of British Men would give up sex for 6 months to get a 50 Inch Plasma TV.

The article explains:

Electrical retailer Comet surveyed 2,000 Britons, asking them what they would give up for a large television, one of the latest consumer “must-haves”. The firm found 47 percent of men would give up sex for half a year, compared to just over a third of women…

A quarter of people said they would give up smoking, with roughly the same proportion willing to give up chocolate.

What would you give sex up for?

Popularity: 20% [?]