Charlottesville is a city of many bumper stickers. Be these stickers political, irreverent, or just plain silly, our World-Class City™ certainly loves to express itself on the posteriors of its vehicles.
Today I spotted this sticker (below the fold for mild profanity) on a car in Belmont. It’s easily my new favorite, because riling Randians anywhere and everywhere is always okay by me.
So, what’s the best local bumper sticker you’ve seen?
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i just tried to read the wikipedia for objectivism. turns out it’s really boring.
parlie: objectively not an a-hole—huzzah!
i, ahem. know the guy who made those stickers. he is, ahem. a friend of mine. ahem ahem. i could definitely, ahem, ask him to pass along a few if you’d like. they’re intended to be freely given out. ahem ahem.
my favorite local bumper sticker (and, I’m sure, parlie’s as well):
“Women at VMI? What’s next, men at UVA?”
A great bumper sticker by Scott Stadium is simple, funny, and clever: “Indie Rock is for Jerks”. I loves some indie, I lub this sticker.
Another classic mysteriously reads “You Make Me So Beard” and it has a beard silhouette on it.
Another classic mysteriously reads “You Make Me So Beard” and it has a beard silhouette on it.
Awesome.
Oh, and “Who Farted?” is a perennial simple favorite.
not a bumper sticker, but I get a big smile from the yellow cabs. Metaphors Be With You.
/total geek
“midwives help people out”
I never metaphor I didn’t like.
license plate on a bmw barreling down i-64: P B4 U GO
8: make that comment a bumper sticker!
Oh, and b-yo (to derail my own thread, ahem, whoops): I’m currently watching the documentary Helvetica, which I think might be up your alley. Check it out.
I’ll go ahead and comment that I a) am like totally BFF with the guy that got those printed up, and b) have a stack on my coffee table. Now I bask in the respect and renown I have garnered by proxy. It’s good to be me.
14: check your LJ message account. I’m requesting one.
Not a bumper sticker, but I saw an SUV with the tag “CM 4 ME.”
Well I’m dense. What does “CM 4 ME” mean?
The best thing I saw, although not a bumper sticker, was the Virginia license plate with AGINA after it…
two of my favorites:
“Mean people suck”
“My other ride is your mom”
I always preferred thisone, myself. Definitely in the “wished I thought of that” category.
I have a vanity plate which is often woefully misinterpreted, often by law enforcement. Been tryin to come up with a new one…
PMPN8EZ? Nah…
@15: I got nothin’, boss. Try again?
@20: b’yo that may or may not have just been emailed to my whole office. Thanks for helping me get the week started right.
If only the going to the DMV didn’t immediately kill all cognitive functions upon entry, one might be able to have such a stroke of genius staring at the vast wall o’ plates.
/now serving B375… at window number 8…
I like… “I’d rather be punching you in the face.”
“My kid beat up your honor student”
“Your girlfriend is fat”
And did anyone ever notice that when a chick has “HOTSTUFF” or “Angel” or something like that on her license plate, the driver of the car looks nothing like her plate suggests?
I have this one on my Chevy:
If this vans rocking, don’t bother knocking.
Gobbler, you are so right on. I have to look when I see those ( ma hope they don’t notice me looking) My husband is always
disappointed when Foxy Ldy, is really not, then I get happy!
I have another favorite. In place of the ubiquitous “University of Fill in the Blank” window stickers, there used to be a car in town that had “Starfleet Academy” on its rear window.
not really a bumper sticker per se, but my friend had a bunch of small stickers with nothing but a bone on it, and we’d go around putting them on other people’s bumper stickers.
We’d change “I heart my poodle!” to “I bone my poodle!”
@26 I used to have a university window sticker for Miskatonic University. Yes, I’m a nerd.
I used to be a fan of “Drive it like you stole it.” until I wandered down little high street one day and came across “If you were agoraphobic, you’d be home by now.”
Not a bumper sticker, but I love the magnet at Cha Cha’s that says “Unattended children will be given a shot of espresso and a kitten.”
I once saw a Toyota MR2 whose license plate read MRNOT.
At a restaurant in Colorado, there was a sign that said “Same day service, no extra charge.”
@27 I had similar stickers, but they had pictures of screws on them. Good times.
@25 – Yeah, it’s like UT QT just got eaten by West Virginia Fat Chick. A dead giveaway is always an RU sticker. Be forewarned.
“My kid is an honor roll student at….” gives me the worst case of road rage. I don’t care that your child is a nerd
434 – we need to get some of our own stickers:
“My kid is pimping your honor roll student”
I saw one two days ago that said – “My hockey student can beat up your honor student.”
Nothing antagonized road rage like: “I’m sleeping with your wife”
I also like: “honk if your hornless”
and “what would homer do?”
always wanted a TShirt with Daphne and Velma with the caption:
“Who would Scooby do?”
I got nothin’, boss. Try again?
Odd; my mail bounced. Marshall: hit me up at stanleysparks[atsign]gmail[dot com] if you’re willing to part ways with one of those stickers.
the ubiquitous “University of Fill in the Blank” window stickers
This reminds me of my favorite of the category, spotted a few years back: some U.Va. student had snipped up his or hers and rearranged it to “Univinia of Virgersity”. I don’t know why but that caused me inexplicable glee.
I love the magnet at Cha Cha’s that says “Unattended children will be given a shot of espresso and a kitten.”
I was aware of the national phenomenon, but I didn’t realize we had a local participant. I raise a glass to Cha Cha’s. That’s hilarious.
The worst bumper sticker I’ve ever seen was on the back of a decaying, rusty old van – “Don’t laugh, your daughter might be inside.”
“worst” as in “best”?
Possibly.
You don’t say…
my moms old boyfriend had an old chevette that had the sticker Shit Happens. but i prefer the one i saw a while back “unless your a hemroid get off my ass”
@44: Hahaha
@44 the ability to post pictures left me speechless
On the back of a cab: Support OPEC. Drive an SUV.
And since I hate (most, NOT all) SUV drivers anyway………….
@18
looking at that plate reminded me of one I saw about a month or so ago. Has anyone seen the license plate that says “illain” after the V? always wondered if it was a cvillain connection or not.
@20 – that made me laugh really, really hard. nigh horked my soup, i did.
@38 – i’ve also seen one that said “virversity of uniginia” that gave me much delight.
@18: The girl with that license plate lived in my house when she got it. Have you seen the rest of the car? It’s crazy. She had blue hair, stole giant 40 gallon tubs of Krispy Kreme frosting to make lesbian porn with, and once freaked out cause her car was blocked in (which resulted in her stabbing knives into the walls). I have all of this on video if you don’t believe me.
A video of “all of this” including the Krispy Kreme part? Ew.
Well I have footage of the Krispy Kreme container in our kitchen. I don’t have video of the porn (if I did, I would have burned it long ago).
Were it not for indiscretion errors, I’d be all for the posting of this video.
Can I also note at the juncture my sadness that this post didn’t piss of some Ayn Rand fans? Okay, good. So noted.
Just saw a bumper ticker in the mall parking lot that said “If yu’re gonna ride my ass at least pull my hair”
/no camera, no picture
Just saw a bumper ticker in the mall parking lot that said “If yu’re gonna ride my ass at least pull my hair”
/no camera, no picture
Whoah! Is there an echo in here?
/my job is to disturb the comfortable and comfort the disturbed.
I liked this one: Save trees, get a bidet
i had on my car if you were agoraphic you’d be home by now…
Panda…. might I suggest you change it to ‘ Dyslexics write letters to Satan at Christmas’
/just sayin.
I just wanted to say that this morning I saw a new-looking Porsche with a bumper sticker on it. If you’re going to buy a 60,000 dollar car, why muck it up with some stupid political bumper sticker?
Bumper sticker regulations:
Toyota=Okay
Kia=Okay
Volvo=Mandatory
Porsche=Not okay
It said Obama didn’t it?
@62: It did indeed. I take it you’ve seen (drive) it, then?
Seen it and thought the same thing. Nice sticker dieter
@64 accept no substitute
Is dieter “R.M.”? (The owner of said 911)
@66: Whoa, I was talking about a Cayenne. You mean there are 2 boorish baboons in this ‘burgh who plaster their pricey Porsche with tastless tailend trash?
actually, “R.M.” is a really nice, smart guy. I agree about bumper stickers, but think that way whether you paid $5k or $100k…
@66 I’m not Ricky Martin – go shake your bon, bon somewhere else
@68 I have no Porsche or political bumper stickers. I have nothing against them either
Oooh, the sanctity of the expensive auto! God help us!
Then this should really get your expensive german panties in a nice knot.
/whoever did it is my hero
@61 i would never put a bumper sticker on my volvo.
Someone fix Orchid’s post… she spelt vulva wrong.
oops
today i saw a bumper sticker that said:
This car brakes for any animals except for Gobblers.
@75
“This car brakes for any animals except for Gobblers.”
This bumper sticker must have been written by a UVa English major.
My favorite bumper sticker I’ve seen is “Only Users Lose Drugs”
Why is it that Hokie fans have to have at least three Hokie stickers on their cars?
I saw one once that I thought was pretty great…it was one of those Jesus fish stickers and next to it, there was a sticker that said “And Chips”…so fish and chips…haha idk it made my day, I still laugh about it when I think of it
i’d pay a premium for a bumper sticker that encourages people to do the math.
@78 That reminds me of one of my favorite print ads ever, which was for Nicoderm or some other such product. It was very simple, just text, and went like this:
Quitting smoking cold turkey is a piece of cake!
(mmmmm, cold turkey and a piece of cake….)
Sounds like the day after Thanksgiving
Dyslexics Untie!
I saw this on one of those ridiculous boxy Scions or Honda Elements (don’t remember which):
“You’ve just been passed by a toaster!”
Don’t ask why, I think it was my mindset at the moment, but I laughed so hard I cried.
What color was it….?
The car? Blue or black, I think.